Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Story of My Life ♥




Baby, I don't want this to be ♥forever♥

I just want it to be for now.

Okay baby I lied;;

I want to wake up to your smile

fall asleep to the sound of your ♥beat.
[Baby.I.Think.|.This.|.Time.|.It's.|.For.|.Real]

See days c/o/m/e &.& g.o
But my feelings for you are for[ever] & ever b.a.b.y


       Listen to the melody of                             this girls beating heart

                  whose ♥ing you for                      all that you are;;

                       & she's wondering                when the dream ends

                            & reality begins,           but with you heaven's

                                 truly a place on     e|a|r|t|h baby with you.

                                    honey promise  you'll never walk away;;

                                         baby[it would be like murder] - &

                                            just promise me forever&ever

                                                   &ever bby, you know I

                                                        I ♥ you honey;;


Do you really AreyouDreamingOfaRomanticEvening me?

baby I hope you can see that this loves for real,

never been so sure about anything in my life [...butyou...]



baby being b.r.O.k.e.N is the story of my life,

will you change a habit of a                     l i f e t i m e?

 

Author notes

okay I know it's not very good.
used the title and the quote

fairy dust.

In a list

A contest entry

♥

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 39 of 39

  • The-Scene-One
    August 31
    Edit | Reply
    this is amazing


  • DramaQueen469 gold member
    May 24
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this is amazing! Dirty Pretty can so easily become overdone and silly, but this is just perfect. It's easy to see why this has so many trophies to its name
    I especially loved the last two lines
    Thankyou so much for entering this piece, and I wish you the best of luck!!

    Maria


  • PaperChainHearts
    May 9

    Edit | Reply
    I like this, it's awfully creative.

    " Do you really AreyouDreamingOfaRomanticEvening me?
    baby I hope you can see that this loves for real,
    never been so sure about anything in my life [...butyou...] "

    However, please go back and read through the rules, as there is the bit in there that you are meant to put in the author notes so I know you have actually read the rules.

    thanks for entering


  • morgana raven Greeters member
    February 23
    Edit | Reply
    I like the use of colour, i can see you spent time organising this.


  • LadyUnique silver member
    January 20

    Edit | Reply
    this looks like it was such fun to write to me it deserves every trophy


  • Snow White Queen
    January 19
    Edit | Reply
    dude this is amazing! I love this!


  • Lady Altheia
    January 19

    Edit | Reply
    Not good huh, yet it won three golds, two silvers and a bronze. I love the poem and the form of the heart and all the little things.


  • Fallen Angel 2
    January 19
    Edit | Reply

    Good Job...

    This piece is raw with emotion... your pieces are full of life... honest and eay to relate.


  • L.Jay
    January 19

    Edit | Reply
    omygosh! i love the set up but the words are even better! From what poems I've read of yours YOU always write amazingly!!!


  • myusikah
    January 19

    Edit | Reply
    That's cool. So that's dirty pretty...eh I still don't get it.

    But I think you're being a bit modest when you say that you don't think it's good.
    I mean, look at all those Gold Trophies!


    Awesome write!
    -->pia♫♪

  • chels-ea
    January 19

    Edit | Reply
    I thought that this was done pretty good. I dont think that it was overdone or hard to read. I just think that some parts were a little cheesy..I hate saying it but thats just how I think sometimes. Most of the parts were very beautifully written.


  • AnarchistXxXLove
    January 19
    Edit | Reply

    not bad

    Not bad, kinds hard to read that's it tho, good job


  • Vertigo-
    January 19
    Edit | Reply
    very unique


  • k.a.s.s.i.e
    January 19

    Edit | Reply
    it's beautiful!!! wow, it's so pretty and creative. i can't even describe it, so i won't cuz i'll mess it up.


    ~kassie

  • Rattlebone
    January 18
    Edit | Reply
    great poem I love the time that was taken. You take time with things you care about


  • Travel Notes
    January 18

    Edit | Reply
    I normally don't like dirty pretty, but this one was really good. The form made it more intense, focused, but wasn't so overused that I lost what the words were by themselves.


  • Echos in Silence
    January 18
    Edit | Reply
    the way you pulled off the general appearence is amazing, this is great!!


  • Susan John Francis
    January 18
    Edit | Reply
    Amazing write...


  • AlmostLover
    January 18
    Edit | Reply
    best dirty pretty i've ever read!
    looooove it so much!


  • HugsForEveryone
    January 18
    Edit | Reply
    forgot the claps

  • HugsForEveryone
    January 18

    Edit | Reply
    Oh, so this isn't very good, and you just so happened to win 3 gold, 2 silver and 1 bronze trophies - AND a spotlight?
    And you STILL think it's not good?
    This is the best dirty pretty I've ever read!
    ~Rose


  • Cynder
    January 18
    Edit | Reply
    This is excellent.


  • Poetic Tasha Moderators member
    January 18

    Edit | Reply
    love the last line, love it
    awesome DP write! congrats on all the shineys for it...

    Tasha


  • Koromone
    January 18
    Edit | Reply
    this is fucking amazing
    good job
    xxx


  • lowercase prelude gold member
    January 14

    Edit | Reply

    WOW

    Holy crap
    This is amazing
    Your talent is on full display here. I hope you win every contest you enter this in because it deserves it. This is such a magnificent piece. I am blown away by it.


  • xXCadyBabbiXx
    January 12
    Edit | Reply
    wow....
    wowowowo.
    This is AMAZING!


  • Candy Morphine
    January 7

    Edit | Reply
    FUCKING EXCELLENT!!! -And thats why it won all those trophy's. And you'll be on my finalists list when you put you Authors name in the AN.


  • EvenStarsBreak--x
    October 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Amazing write, I loved the emotion. =] Very Beautifully written, excellent job. Thank you for your entry and good luck.

    x-Pretty-Odd-x <3


  • Jaffa-
    October 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I thought it was wonderful.
    The end really made me smile.


  • SchizoChic
    September 27, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This is lovely. Best of luck.


  • Darkwell
    August 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I just loved this the first time i read it and i love it as much now simply a gorgeous DP ♥

  • Darkwell
    July 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    this piece is so pretty i wanna frame it like a special finger painting

    such amazing DP about surviving the broken heart and hoping to fill it

    Do you really AreyouDreamingOfaRomanticEvening me?

    WOW this is DB Dirty Beautiful

    WTG! Good luck in the contest


  • Disturbed Prodigy
    July 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i don't know what it is but i love the form and the way you did this poem i like poems like this, the message is tight and the form finishes it in a knot, keep it flowing and good luck.


  • Kiss the girl--x
    July 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    What are you talking about woman, this is amazingggg!!!!!

    I'm really hungry, but on a refusing to eat kinda time, this was fantastical, hoping he makes up his mind about what he'll be for you, if you know what I mean, if you don't I'm not making a lot of sense in general, don't worry

    lovesss.
    ♥


  • innocence jaded.xx
    July 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    WOW. No, haha, this is like over-the-top AMAZING. Seriously. This is one of the best Dirty Pretties I've seen in a LONG time. Don't be surprised if you place.

    "I want to wake up to your smile

    fall asleep to the sound of your ♥beat.
    [Baby.I.Think.|.This.|.Time.|.It's.|.For.|.Real]"

    Beautiful lines. My absolute favorite. I also loved the A.D.O.R.E thing. Very creative. & the structure? Pshh, creatively astounding ! Thank you so much for entering. I said I don't applaud, but hell, I'm gonna applaud this ! ♥


  • innocence jaded.xx
    July 10, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Ohkay :] For your title, use "The Story of My Life"
    Hope that's ohkayyy♥


    • xxRainbowDawnxx
      July 10, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      lol I meant me waiting is the story of my life lmao

      • innocence jaded.xx
        July 10, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        I hear ya. hahaha same here. I always wait & I am very impatient
        You can still use that as a title unless you want something else ?
        Like use this line:

        Days c/o/m/e &.& g.o
        But my feelings for you are for[ever]

1 - 39 of 39