The sun arose bright, awakening a beauty
Her vermilion hair shone in the intense lighting
She was ready to start a new day, no more tears burdening her way
She felt alive; revived, there were no more irritating nuisances in her life
She swept them away yesterday,
her positive mood was here to stay
The storm last night was praised and thanked;
it purified her threatened life
She overcame the feeling of fear;
she endured and comprehended what was experienced
She overlooked her town in pride,
felt nothing could stop her again on the inside
The oppression of yesterday’s cries,
the residue emotions of abandonment of her parents when she was five,
the people at school who picked a fight were gone forever more on the inside
She won the battle inside her head,
she said ‘it’s over now, torn to shreds, defeat the negativity restraining your inner beauty’
She rose from the ashes of yesteryear, born as a new person in divinity,
with power encrusted in her personality
She was numb to the world’s cruelty
Purity
Author notes
One of the best inspirational poems I've ever written and I'm very proud
Option 1
zombiefiedmonkeycheese
A contest entry
- Inspiring Lift Up by Confused CRow.
625 points, ended July 14, 2008, 24 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - anything & prewites by whos my humblepie.
600 points, ended July 20, 2008, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Contest with options ( prewritten poems allowed)for three days.... enter early by Manoj Sanyal.
375 points, ended July 29, 2008, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Best contest EVER! [i would like to think so anyway haha] by thearmsofsorrow.
475 points, ended August 1, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-Writes That Deserve A trophy by piccola.
600 points, ended August 9, 2008, 56 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Gimme your greenies by crazymomma.
300 points, ended August 11, 2008, 58 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - For those I forgot by crazymomma.
500 points, ended September 7, 2008, 22 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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Indeed very inspirational. I love the hope in this write. Too many people need to read this and realize true beauty. This is great. Thanks for entering and good luck
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hard to imagine vermillion hair. It would be almost cadmium red or even across between red and orange. Maybe like Lucille Ball ... maybe darker. I can't imagine it myself. It is true that a positive attitude can let your inner beauty shine forth. Nice up-lifting poem. thank you for entering
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Hey
Hmm well to be quite honest
I dont really think this fits the prompt exactly, as the prompt [if i recall correctley] was creative clever and witty with plays on words. This is a wonderful, like seriously really good inspirational poem but not quite what im looking for im afraid. nice poem
cheers and thanks for the entry
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nice poem... though a bit out of topic.
Best wishes and good luck,
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"The storm last night was praised and thanked;
it purified her threatened life"
I loved this line, more so because everytime it rains I feel like it cleanses my soul too. Very nicely put.
"vermilion hair"
I really liked this phrase. 'vermilion' is a great way for describing hair redder than auburn, though "shun" should definitely be 'shone'
"She rose from the ashes of yesteryear, born as a new person in divinity,
with power encrusted in her personality
She was numb to the world’s cruelty
Purity"
Awww, this was pure beauty! Splendidly ended!!
A thoroughly enchanting read!
Peace
Anansey -
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Thank you for your lovely comment It's very much appreciated. I'm glad you liked it and thanks for the criticism
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Any time!(regarding the criticism) He, he
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'Her vermilion hair' great descriptive detail you have here, such an original image - shone not shun? 'The oppression of yesterday's cries' really effective use of personification that so encapsulates a situtation. Love the way this tells the story of overcoming adversity, it's amazing what we can do, or rather what the human spirit can do. You should be proud of this, congrats on the trophy, I wouldn't dream of being a nit pick with this! Great write as ever.xx
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She rose from the ashes of yesteryear, born as a new person in divinity,
with power encrusted in her personality
She was numb to the world’s cruelty
Purity
^^
this last stanza is a perfect ending..the poem is wonderful; I absolutely love it. Adjectives like "vermilion" added to the imagery did a wonderful job! keep it up ! however...i feel sad after reading this poem..tht also means it touched my heart.. -
terrific piece. the emotion and imagery was fantastic. and this was indeed beautiful
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oh my gosh.
thats was beautiful!
kind of describes me.
thats kinda what i was looking for
thank you for this great poem
and entering my contest.
best of luck!
+!~Confused CRow~!+
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"defeat the negativity restraining your inner beauty" - very good!
Wishing you all the best
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Like the use of the almost phoenix like imagery you use throughout to show how we can always overcome whatever rubbish life may hurl at us. I also like the way you've structured this with the use of single words between some lines for effect. One minor niggle, if you're using run on lines - enjambement- you don't necessarily need the use of upper case to commence the majority of your lines. The use of appropriate punctuation or enjamebement will only enhance this. Great use of language to convey the feelings of the poetic voice throughout - nice write and thanks for sharing.
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reborn in purity.
I loved the idea... the deep meaning behind it all. yes, it does draw in much inspiration I for one was deeply inspired by it. The positive enegy made me want to wrap my thoughts with this piece. I loved it very much.
Keep those thoughts flowing... may you always have your muse, lastly always be proud of whatever write you come up with.
blessed be
Blanche
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*hug*s
Thank you very much
. I honsetly think my work isn't that good but I always take compliments from anyone, even if it may be negative I take it as constructive criticism.
Thanks loads for your comment and courtesy. Its much appreciated.
~Emily~ xx
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you are humble.
it is good to take in all positive and negative feedback. . . but I praise you for this one... it was really really good! And you are most welcome Em
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As I read more and more of your poems, I see a style that is unique and original. This is no exception to that classification. The title itself couldnt be more perfect for the words accompanied by it. The very last word, purity, was the final touch that made me fall for this writing. You're talented, keep that pen handy.
Silvos.
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Beautiful!!
This is absolutely beautiful!! I loved it...this is one of your best by far!^_^ Keep it up!
~Kayla~
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