him....the one who haunts my dreams

i know who you are.
i remember the details.
the smells.
the sights.
how everything felt.
the touch you gave.
the heat of your breath.
i remember everything.
and ever detail haunts me dreams.
the dragon spoke the truth.
the lies that i thought that were wrapped around him.
were all truths.
i dont know how to tell you.
that i remember.
and i know the feelings.
they are unearthed.
i want to test them.
want to know if they are alive.
or just be dead.


it hurts.
i know the beast.
the one that claws at you.
the one that urges the hunt.
the feedings.
i know him.
the one i held.
the one i tamed.
hes mine.
your mine.
im yours.
or we once were.


i remember you from somewhere.
i remember that beast.
i remember your hunger.
          its  hunger.


i need to breathe.
need to take it all in.
i know the words are right.
i know that life existed.
but its so hard to believe it.
even from my own lips.


im ready to loose it all.
to ruin everything that ive built to stop this.
whatever this fate shall be from happening.


it will happen again.
the beast.
so untamed.
will take its prisoners.
mankind.
slaughter them.
kill them.
kill everything that he loves.
once loved.
everyone around it.
unfed.
family.
his family.
destroyed.

vividness of it all.
all the blood.
all the screams.
all the madness.
all the chaos.

i remember it all.
i remember its claws.
i remember its teeth.
i remember the nights i stayed up.
with the beast.
the nights i taught it control.
remember it so alive.
so much better.


i dont know how to stop it this time.
i cant.
i am not meant to.
i see that.
i am not meant to fix it.
i am not meant to be his saviour again.
how can i be?
when i am so far but so close?