Hopes are dangling things
they often take up too much space.
Striving intangibles, none can ever truly reach.
Still those, ‘somehow kept’ mementoes, we will keep
to ourselves, for each, our own ‘ironical comedies’.
Not unlike carrots on a string:
We, always reaching
hopping, hoping.
(hop along now)
Next act:
Faith, well, that’s an ancient tree.
Fruits of life these, (also hanging things),
compelling nightmares to conspire dreams.
Ideals which should, in all reality, just not be.
These days, ‘it’ is in its, 'progressive state',
faith that is,
(withering).
These
slow, but surely scornful fruits,
rots upon the entropic stage.
Then again, the dialog remains
the same, “would you believe?”
is being replaced
by a methodical creep.
Shh…listen to the weeds breed
bearing hope’s fornicating bunnies.
Until look! A strange looking bush
strangles a tree.
(struggles of upwards’ mobility)
Action!
Dynamics, now those are energies.
Riders upon waves,
...or particle beams.
Always one or the other
never each, while the other's remaining.
Driving sciences to insanity
To speculate that is, to say:
dynamic’ paths of compiling probabilities,
compressing possibilities.
Changing, when, what, even where, we cannot see.
Almost depressing, that is,
what’s hidden in nature’s mystery. Why?
For lack of faith that’s hoping?
for want of hope’s,
six billion rabbits
Hopping?
Or , perhaps this is all about sex,
you know: Connectivity.
A contest entry
- Quantum Thoughts #2: Connectivity by islekine.
600 points, ended July 23, 2008, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - That is some deep sh** by once.
650 points, ended February 14, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrites. by Antebellum.
400 points, ended November 14, 195 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Or , perhaps this is all about sex,
you know: Connectivity.
haha I love this part.
fantastic write.
thanks for taking the time to enter. -
I laughed out loud at the last line here...and then I sat here for a few minutes and thought..."yeah, sad, isn't it?" Your write here is so deep I fell in and am happy I did. I like your play with the words we think we understand and yet, you turn them on end and shake out new perspectives! Faith hope, love...I enjoy the feel of growth and withering, new excitement and disappointment throughout the text. Well done! I'll read this again and again I'm sure, just to laugh and ponder those great 'carrots' you placed here for my hungry heart and mind. Thanks! Peace, Rhonda
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thank you so much rhondasail-glad you enjoyed this...peace
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Wow... This is amazing!! So different to most of the things I've read on this site. Congratulations - my brain enjoyed the workout!!
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I like the concrete images you put forth about hope and faith as dangling, or hanging things, the allusion to the tree of life and such. These things dangle, we strive to reach. They take up space (maybe space of reality or actuality?)
Then there's:
"Shh…listen to the weeds breed
bearing hope’s fornicating bunnies.
Until look! A strange looking bush
strangles a tree."
Weeds breed - I can relate to this, never thought of it this way, but, sure! Absolutely!
Stuffed animals and McDonald trinkets breed, too. But I'm off point.
Too much hope. Too "many" hope. Too many to cope? Six billion sounds like a lot.
Hope, Faith strangle Reason. Reason, as it dies, releases it's venom - brutal reality.
Am I close? Much to chew on here.
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Hello Freed by mercy, I'm sorryi t has taken so long to get back too you with regards to your comment on my Connectivity poem. First off thank you for your motivating reply it is always appreciated. At the end of your comment you asked if you were clos--absolutely-in a nutshell I was just trying to point out that hope is the lesser of faith in fact hope is a thing that can never truly be touched because once you touch hope it is no longer really hope is it? Hence the "dangling hope", and the hopping bunnies(Like a carrot danging from a string) Now faith is the more important thing but so many more people cling to hope that it has become like a weed strangling the idea of hope--I believe that if a man has faith the only reason he would need hope is for the hope that others find faith--the last part is science and its dynamics that only seem to beget more science and that seems to be the trend of the world today-now science (ironically) holds no faith only hopes for finding this and hopes for finding that ect....I finished with the connectivity of it all--sex- the perpetration of more human beings into our future of scientific confusing hopes--six billion of us and counting-rabbits hopping for the carrots of hope...I dont usually go into something this long about my poems but you did ask and I do appreciate that your comment was so right on-it gives me Faith in my writting that I do not always speak gibberish-thanks again and ...peace
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bravo bravo and bravo some more
the way you have constructed this piece of art blows me awy
take a bow
T
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thank you Moonsail-I always put so much time into 'constructing ' each poem, more often than not I think to myself-"perhaps I have taken this one to far outside of the so called box" (not that that has ever stopped me) -it is nice to hear someone say the appreciated it-thank you...peace
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"Deep train of thought that leads to where(?)that was kind of the whole point-six billion people and really who knows what leads to where? Connectivity's are in the moments so chill out and enjoy them ...thanks for the comments and... peace
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a deep train of thought that leads where(?)
this is what i was asking for. and yet i got lost in the tangents. it gave me food for thought and a great read. thank you and good luck. -
Set me grinning again. Always a joy to read you.
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lol. I like all the inuendo here, very cleverly written, and a very interesting read, thanks!
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bloody brilliant ... brilliantly funny, and making good and well deserved fun at the big word sayers the little brain loading capacity
yeah, that is right, that is kinda where the answer is, but ,,, gosh
... how many research grants and stuff can ya get thinking like yer poem does?
rabbits, hopping, hoping ... ))oO))
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you are wonderful Michael!!
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Another wonderful write!!!
I will have a hard time judging this contest! thanks so much for sharing your talent!!
Write on!
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I found this quite interesting....a unique take on the prompt given....very creative.
Love your images, and the humor you've thrown into this.
best wishes in the contest.
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I love this!
Especially the second stanza...
Really pondering points here.
☼Becky☼
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hey Ten, glad you liked this-I saw the requirements for islekin's contest, and although i don't normally like to write poems for contest i could'nt resist the draw of science and religion and the fun of throwing the sexual innuendos throughout-pure fun-we all need that..thanks -peace
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You always find such an interesting, "back door" approach. A very clever read. Hope and faith and science---the stuff that centuries will argue and never be in agreement, but you have explored them here in this little almost play-like fashion. I loved how you talked about true faith being choked out the garbage thinking, as if faith should be some esoteric pursuit. God forbid!
I also loved the clever ending. It was funny, and really almost smart-eleck (sp?). And I love a sharp tongue.
So much to think about here. Well done.
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