The walls of stench
Permeate the senses of the mind,
The sweet smell of decay
Burns in the conscience
Skeletal desperation.
Judging the very existence of life
Death walks with a virus.
Destroying the life it touches
A needle prick.
Poison runs through the streets,
A shadow of an existence
That fails a machine
Masked and cloaked.
Scarecrows dance on the graves
Of addiction;
A bottle of bleach
Eating the insides
Of a dead city.
A toast to the materialistic plastic surgery
Of artifice
Penicillin for diseased thought
Blackened cancer;
Stains the faux buildings
For a truth that's too hard to swallow
Decomposed into lies.
Author notes
Option Four: This Hell We've Created
In a list
A contest entry
- plight of the individual by unraveled.
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• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - From Beginning to End by HisOneTrueLove6107.
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How does it make you feel?
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Nice piece.
Thanks for your entry and good luck! -
I agree wholeheartedly. I like how detailed the imagery is and leaves a definite picture in the mind's eye. My favourite had to be the last three lines. It's a lovely close to the piece -- and I don't know if anyone else felt this -- but it kept me thinking about all the lies spread through not just friends and school, but on a much larger basis/scale. Like how many lies have we kept from other countries or vice versa. Is there really anything left out there that isn't a lie? But anyways, enough of my ramblings on how horrible our world has turned out to be. The greatest of luck in the contest to you. You have to be the third or so Society poem I've read that has just left me breathless and amazed at what people can do when they put their minds to work.
HOT -
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Thank you very much
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i have to agree that i too enjoyed the vocabulary that you chose here, great job.
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Nicely done. Appalling imagery increases the impact of the message in this poem. Best of luck in the contest.
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Thank you for the read and the comment. It is much appreciated.
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Poignant
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I loved this poem for a number of reasons.
1- i've been on penicillin and know how it feels
2- your word-choice was exquisite "skeletal" "cloaked" "blackened"
3- just enjoyable
it talked about something we all can relate to ... and that's society... it is the way it is... i don't think that punctuation is really needed but might help a little... poems are meant to be read by voice and meaning, not word for word as a sentance
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Wow, I actually enjoyed this very much. My only suggestion would be line breaks/punctuation to help with the flow. The approach to the subject is very interesting and kept my attention pretty well. I like all the description that you gave, especially the imagery like "scarecrows dance on the graves of addiction"- awesome line.
Thank you for the entry,
-cassidy
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