That's my puck.
We both see our target.
Sitting behind the net.
The opposing goalie stops the puck.
From wrapping around the boards.
Securing it's position.
That's my puck.
We both feel each other's presence.
As we race for the puck.
No eye contact is made.
As it isn't needed.
We both know we're there.
That's my puck.
He gains on me slightly.
As we pass the goal line.
He's about the reach the puck.
He's about to beat me to it.
That's my puck.
He touches the puck.
So I touch him.
Harder than a touch, you may presume.
His hip slams mine.
As he sails into the boards.
The puck free once more.
For me to have.
That's my puck.
Fucker.
Author notes
Although the last line may be too much, I decided to give it a shot.
Comments
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I've myself played some hockey and this is a great write on 2 folks fighting for the same puck. I also see what in life this is. Two people trying for the same goal, the puck, so they can try to score in life and there is only one winner. Nice!!
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Ok once again I feel the need to write a very long comment points out parts I loved cuz this is just that good:
Line 2: I like how you make the puck a target. A goal to reach it. Not just an object, but sometihng that you both wanted. Intersting concept.
10-12: No eye contact is needed. You can just tell that he is there, wanting the same thing that you want. Very well worded.
Last line: PERFECT. I loved it. The repeating line of "thats my puck" is really good. I enjoyed your persistance.
It's very obvisouy you play a game you love. Please read my poem "My Biggest Regret" I think you'll understand it more than others. Very well writen.
Warmest,
Mylee
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