The war on terror
Is a war without end
Blood so deep soaking our hands
Defy logic in our hateful minds
Both sides doing horrific deeds
All in the name of genocide
Fires burning with such rage
Hating human life
Exterminating all
defy your small closed minded ways
This is the future
We live in now
Doomsday riding in for the last blow
Author notes
We are headed for doomsday without a doubt. Look at all the horrible things we do to each other in the news, day after day. A war without end. Our doom will come.
A contest entry
- Ashamed to be Human by Death of the Author.
450 points, ended August 31, 2008, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Looks good
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Thank you
I am glad I got this where I want it to be now. Good luck in judging the contest and thanks for the helping hand. This poem may enter other contests so I need it to be contest ready.
I hope you have fun judging and thanks for all the support you given me.
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I hope this flows better
I had to do some real tinkering with this one. I hope this flows better and does not take away from the piece. I thought about adding more to the piece but I do not wish to disrupt the flow of this one any more. -
More alterations
Ack I hacked it up. Now I am getting a bit frustrated. I can format it back the way it was but do minor editing to get rid of the clutter.
See what this looks like. Thanks. I am just trying to get this thing tight and looking nice. Thanks for your supportive constructive help. -
Ack. That really long line spoils the flow, I think you should cut it down, or think about changing it. You're probably right, we'll end up killing ourselves outright soon enough. I quite like this...it's just...does exactly what it says on the tin I guess. Not fancy, but not simple.
Thank you for your entry.
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I did some alterations
I tinkered with the line spacing. I do not know if this will help with the clutter. Tell me what you think. I will revise this if needed. Thanks -
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To be honest I have to say I prefered it the way it was (sorry). Thanks for letting me know.
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My Dear Friend,
You are right! (and that is sad) But that is the way we are heading, and if we don't wake up, and start working together, and finding was to correct this problem, then we are all to blame, and deserve what we get.
The Earth was given to us, so that we may help one another, and learn from each other. We are destroying that and ourselves in the process.
Great job on this one! as always
and love
Nyetta
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I agree with your notes..and your poem was great.
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