Cease to be

The Earth quakes as my stubborn feet leave his sturdy house.
Maybe this was a mistake.
My heart aches, as well as every other part of me.
I cannot cry, it just won’t happen.

Trembling hands cling to my clothes as I wish this wasn’t happening.
I don’t know why I even bothered getting upset.
This isn’t what I want; it’s not what I want at all.
I’m around the block and you’re still not chasing after me.

Birds are beginning to chirp, and the day is about to break.
I regret it. I regret it all; it’s something I can’t fake.
Walking down this road alone, my stubborn feet want to keep going
but my stubborn heart wants to turn around.

It was a mistake, an overreaction; a misunderstanding.
I’m too stubborn, I took it too far.
The sky is swollen blue-grey, like it’s about to burst a million tears.
My eyes feel the same; I wish this was over.

My lips are starved, cracking and dry,
I want to cry.
My mouth is dry. My face is numb.
Just take me home, please.


The small hum of rubber on pavement
and the Earthquake of your temper explode when you see me.
As stubborn as my feet are, my heart crumbles under your harsh words.
I don’t even feel real anymore.

What took you so long?
Forget it; all I know is that I won’t be the one left behind.
Leave me alone, go back to bed, that’s what this is all about anyway.
Stupid fights.

I feel so alone, that’s what this is about.
But all you want to do is shout.
You want me to explain to you that I feel alone?
That I just lost my best friend, and I’m losing you too?

That I feel sad and alone when you don’t talk to me,
when you just crawl over me into bed and then turn the other way.
You don’t even say goodnight, or kiss me.
Your excuse at the end of this battle is that you thought I was already asleep.

I was talking to you.
I looked at you.
I turned to you.
I tapped your shoulder for five minutes.

No reply.
So I told you I was leaving.
And you tell me you’re not going to stop me.
Well you did.

This is so stupid.
Our fighting makes me feel so insignificant.
Isn’t something missing?
An “I love you” when you walk me home?

You’re mad that I didn’t tell your mother the real reason why I left.
Yet you want me to lie to mine.
I’m furious and my feet are more stubborn than ever.
Just go.

You’re quite the hypocrite and I don’t know what I see in you.
This is just another fight. We’ll be fine in a few hours.
So walk me home, we’ll talk this out.
Get some sleep; we both know we’re sorry.

We need each other like milk needs cookies,
like peanut butter needs jam.
We need each other can’t you see?
We need each other, or we’d cease to be.

We’re both stupid fools in love,
with stupid hearts, and stupid feet,
with stupid thoughts and stupid fights.
But I think you need to know
that my stubborn heart would cease to be without you.