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Implosion

Fog
    surrounds me,
          like soot

Incendiary
    thoughts scorch,
          burning deep

Silently
    stealing away gravity,
          beneath feet

Trampled,
    self-destructing,
        I implode







Author notes

Prompt: Mindfields

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? • Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

  • garde a l eau
    July 8

    Edit | Reply
    Ground Zero, soot, ashes, rubble. Visibility, none, when eyes are closed inside of a fist, yet the energy must go somewhere in the hits we try not to feel. Negatives have no place to build. The first action is always a thought....


  • phantasyintrigue-x silver member
    July 8

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this is awesome!

    "like soot" A short but effective simile here.

    "Incendiary thoughts scorch"
    Love the fire expressed here.

    "stealing gravity"
    Ahaha, great verb use with 'stealing'.

    "self destructing"
    A hyphen (-) perhaps in between?

    I can totally see the explosion...thanks for entering

  • ShadowsMidnightRose
    July 8

    Edit | Reply
    Perfection! There's nothing I really could say about it other than that.....

    Well done and good luck!