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Lost Butterfly Flutters

Lost butterfly flutters its wings against the wind;

thoughts scatter in directions--south, east, north and west.

Sail through the lone blue skies – the yearn driven chagrin;

lazily, decisions are made in haste. Surely it’s best

yonder across the land she’s needing more –crosswind.

Regions mark her path pushing her far Midwest.

 

In glittering rays of the sun

nothing in her can be dismayed.

Greater to live free—life’s begun,

required the outlook she'd displayed.

Does she seek sorrow from this run?

Self preservation calls – “crusade!”

     

Worth--endless sunbeams

hold in all my dreams.

   

Author notes

Harrisham Sonnet
Rhyme scheme:

First stanza : ababab
Second stanza: cdcdcd
Third stanza: ee

I wanted to keep to your rules which I did... Each first word ending letter starts the next lines starting word. But, having fun with it at the same time I attempted to make a sentence that related to the poem. -- If that isn't enough... I also metered my sentence putting the stress on the stress syllable- I believe, however I just started to learn about meter--so I'm still working on my skills. My creative juices must had been on over drive because the first stanza is 12 syllables, the 2nd stanza is 8, and finally the last stanza has 5 syllables. ***Note "Lazily, decisions are made in haste, surely it's best," is an oximoron purposely penned. Meaning "People put off making decisions until the last minute, then they make it in haste. Sometimes it works out other times it don't -- in relation to the butterfly it 'did' work out.

The poem is meant to be more-abstract/metaphoric. The butterfly is more about someone who goes from here to there never really settling down. The last stanza is though it may not be your dream, it is mine -- capturing the free spirit full of adventure/travel.

Since, this was my first time trying it... I just wanted to enjoy it. It is a bit tougher than I thought it was going to be [hense the reason I really wanted to challenge myself to make your style unique even for you.] ... I'd love to try this again, maybe next time I'll be a little more strict.

Thanks for the contest!

A contest entry

Please give me some honest feedback~ Critique's welcomed

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Comments


  • penman gold member
    July 30
    Edit | Reply

    Wonderful

    Very creative and terrific use of form. Congratulations on your silver it was well deserved.


  • NeonRose silver member
    July 29
    Edit | Reply
    Wow! You took this form to a whole new level! Congratulations on the Silver!


  • Harrisham Minhas
    July 27

    Edit | Reply
    This is a beautiful abstract poem about life's journey.
    You've taken the butterfly as a metaphor to express your thoughts.
    You have certainly challenged yourself with the meter, although this form is more about maintaining a constant overall rhythm of the 14 lines.
    You have done a good job...and I look forward to reading more of your poems in this form.

    You have applied the rules of Harrisham Sonnet correctly.

    Thanks for your entry.

    Harrisham Minhas