I remember laying on the floor
Wondering if I weighed a little more
Hearing the voices in my head
Tell me all the things I should do instead
That porcelain goddess that forgave my deed
Of eating too much food then I need
The scale is the devil to which I pray
To just make it through one more day
Celery stalks and no more bread
Again repeat those voices in my head
She tells me things, they all are lies
Can you see the pain in my eyes?
She said you were right, I'm just a cow
You watch and watch and I wonder how
You can see me lose and see the scars
At night I wish upon the stars
That someone will save me from myself
And notice the box upon my shelf
Where I keep my inspiration
And where I spend my concentration
Depression sinks in as friends fade away
I wish that someone would just please stay
Beauty is only skin deep they've said
Laying alone, awake, in my bed
I can't move, I can't run
From all these thoughts except just one
Those words won't leave, no, not at all
You pushed me up against this wall
"She's chubby, she's not thin"
Well look at me now. Can I ever win?
I've done this for you, for everyone else
Nothing ever for myself
It's not that great, being beautiful
The water I drink gives me my full
100,99,98 pounds
Dropping and dropping to the ground
Light as air, stiff as board
This is all I could afford
Beauty is pain, so I'm F*#%ing gorgeous
I did this for the both of us
Fighting to breath, these tears I shed
Knowing someday I'll be dead
A contest entry
- Living Life Your Way by gettingoutofme.
390 points, ended July 22, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Just tell me what you think.
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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WONDERFUL!!!!!
I love the emotionaly composed feeling of this poem
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This is a wonderful poem. I absolutely adore the way you seemed to touch something so many seem to struggle with. Good luck in hte contest.
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no problem!
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beauty is only skin deep
i think it was a great poem! i think you should name it that! good luck! and keep writng!
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i think that is a very good title for this
thank you.
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Welcome to AllPoetry
Having suffered an eating disorder in the past I can relate so strongly to what you have penned; I really like how you have written this sharply and seemingly simple but it holds poetic beauty in high reguard, your lines
"That porcelain goddess that forgave my deed
Of eating too much food then I need"
To the point and excellent!
♥
Enjoy AllPoetry
Stay safe
~Manda
Site Greeter
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