She licks me finger-deep
while I am fast asleep.
She wants to keep me neat.
She licks my toes and feet.
She rubs, she licks, she sucks;
then bolts the door and fucks.
She licks my inner thigh
and makes me moan and cry.
Her naughty tongue explores
my juicy corridors.
Author notes
SHE advised me not to reveal all what happens between us...So don't blame me if there are missing links.....Just imagine what else might happen....I bet your imagination is quite powerful.
A contest entry
- Mmmmmm.... SEXY by Still single.
500 points, ended July 17, 2008, 30 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
An Open Invitation.....What do you think?
Comments
1 - 67 of 67
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so sensual even if there are some missing links.. it leaves me with my own wild imagination
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I love it. The words are really nice
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i love the " she rubs she likes she sucks, then bolts the door and fucks" your a genius, seriously. simple, but genius. i can tell you if someone was licking me finger-deep I would NOT be fast asleep nice write, honey. i need to write something and dedicate it to you.
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JustAnotherIdoit
You're such a cuty, honey! I feel like licking your finger...
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I really do wish i was a girl so i could join too. ):
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very kinky, i like the fact your not shy to say how it is
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phsychogirl123
Are you suggesting, honey, I'm shameless? Thank you! -
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your welcome hun x lol
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phsychogirl123
Kisses for your erotic gesture, babe!
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certain imagination's can run wild with this piece as I know mine did. You truely deserved the silver on this and I thank you for sharing, now off to add you as a favorite.
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Nite Soul
My wilder dreams are yet to come true...
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This flowed well and really was an overall great read. It left images in the mind of the reader. Congrats on the silver
**Master Ktulu**
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Master Kutlu
Thank you very much!
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wanna try w/me?
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SEXiiGONZALEZ
When?
Where?
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Sighs with passion. something ye seem to be verra good at lass.
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Leonura
I mistook your sigh for moaning. I bet your moans are delicious too.
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"tasty" poem here. i love the thoughts created in my mind from this write. congrats on the silver.
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soul survivor
The taste of the pudding is in its eating, sweetie!
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wow
this is hot. mind numbingly sensual. Makes me wish I was there watching -
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MissErinMichelle
Thanks for the reservation.
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Another great write by you!
Well done and congratulations on your Silver
for this one. Keep up the wonderful work here!
Jeremy0826 -
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Jeremy0826
I need not keep up the work lest there is the dearth of juices in the long run.
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lulz,,
kinky much??
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Ingridfalls
Let me check the dick-tionary to see what kinky means.
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Her naughty tongue explores
my juicy corridors.
ooh my.... that's enough to make absolutely anyone hot right there. your rhyme is tight and your imagery is amazing. keep up the good work!!! -
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Nymph-Angel
Let me know the names of the ones who might get hot. I might need them.
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wow this is yet another one that is omfggg
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XSyNnFul-SyNLex
Let's do it together....lol
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intense ! :]
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Rhythm
Thanks...
A kiss!
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Wow! This is great. I am really impressed. Also I am honored a person with such skill would even comment on mine. Thank you. ~~Iridessa~~
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Iridessa
Thank you, honey!
You are so sweet, so kissable! -
MoonFlower
My aim is to fill myself with pleasure....
and return the favor...if anyone fills me with lustful pleasure...
Thank you, honey!
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Oh wow...
I love it!!!! It so good! It made me shiver, in a good way, for more...very nice Galaxy!
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Oh. My. Gosh. This is nastily delicious!!
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cre8tiv-writer
Your comment is delicious...
you must be delious too...
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awesome poem, you always seem to make me want more.. lol
the secretness just show's how loyal you are, your truelly a kindrid sperit.
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lovespell86
Thanks honey...
Secrect gives me pleasure...and makes the women secure...usually they need secrecy...I always do it very very secretively...
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Oooohhh...
Naughty! Congrats on the Silver! -
Ah Naughty SHE, she is!! This is a great one!!!
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hotchocolate
I like it naughty...
Want to be naughty with me, sweet baby?
Galaxy2
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wow, you are a very good erotic writer. you always leave me wanting more. great great way and creativety. line after line, you left me speachless.
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Lexie
It was not my intention to make you speechless, honey!
My intentions were really bad....
I hope you know what I mean...
Kissessss, cutie!
Galaxy2
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this was really well written, not to mention, VERY juicy...congrats on silver!
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blaq roze
I can't stop the juices when they tend to flow....
Thanks for the comment!
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Mmmm.
Wow, now that's a poem for ya. Very descriptive, very discreet, very good. :kiss:
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Kokokitty
Thank you, my sweet Kitty!
You can kiss me anywhere you feel like.... -
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Uh huh... Like... *kisses neck and collarbone* there?
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Kokokitti
Mmm...not bad for a start....
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I think you did an excellent job with descriptions of lust while being graceful to the imagination. Simply sexy and sultry. Good luck in the contest.
Ted E
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Ted E Bare
The comment is excellent...thank you... -
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Comment repeated three times so I edited two of them(lol). -
I felt like this would be in the top three. Congrats on the Silver sweet ladyTed E
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This says a lot for something so edited I love the rhyme and touch of sharing...well done.
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JezlsaRos
Thank you very much indeed for the encouraging comment, noney!
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I loved it! It really let my imagination run wild. I love sexy poems and stories like this! Keep up the good work!
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BrookeLea
I keep my mind open...allowing my imagination run wild...
I enjoy it that way...
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hi love how are you now you no i love this hell i love all of your writing luv you!!!!!!!
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cherrysmile
Seems you like my poems more than I do.
And do you know, honey, what I love....CHERRIES PRESENTED WITH A LUSTFUL SMILE....
Galaxy2
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The combination of enjambement and end-stopped rhymes in these sizzling couplets gives the poem a wonderful flow. The images are crisp and vivid - it's such a relief to read a sensual poem which is not littered with tautological adjectives, as this makes the nouns more evocative and sexy.
Good luck in the contest,
Myron.
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myron
That's really very very encouraging a comment, baby!
So grateful!
Galaxy2
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p.s. i think you have chosen the wrong word in line 8, did you really mean mourn and not moan?
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Still single
It was an unintentional slip. Rectified. Thanks.
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Good work, i really enjoyed the read because its so light hearted and sexy. and great lines in the middle, "she rubs, she licks, she sucks, she bolts the door and fucks." And bolting the door has such a great medievil and castle type connotation.
The last couplet could use your attention, you've just got the stresses a bit wrong and it makes it very hard to read, right when you want the reader to fell happy and content with the flow. you'll see what i mean if you say it out loud.
thanks for the entry. -
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Still single
Your comment is highly educative and encouraging. Thank you very much. Your observation of the last couplet seemed to be valid. I decided to delete it. Thank you, my dear!
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