Someone who I let enter my door
Observed and stated
I run from fate.
I attempt to not know what fate is.
And then you were there.
How could it be
Too distant to drive so far
I only have seen a picture
Never heard your voice
But the plan begins tonight
You were able to make love to me anyway
like a book
written like a poem
I guessed you as you asked me to
Listening to music
Lifting me
Holding me against you
loving me
but we are just starting to be friends
A sharing of sad times and ice cream flavors
Only the beginning..Page ten maybe.
I am tempted to skip ahead but I like the anticipation.
Author notes
trying not to flip the page too fast!
Comments
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Patience Is A Virtue...
Anticiipation can sometimes be a good thing, dependin on the situation. Nice job! Simple, yet Lovely!
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Relevance
This is so true with life...sometimes things seem so good that you want to rush through...and skip ahead; but the ride along the way ends up being the best part. Let life take it's course and you're still gonna end up at that destination; just more experienced. I loved the ending in this piece as it sums it all up in the simplest of terms.
I love the emotion and the tense feeling but am not a fan of the structure at all; seems disjointed. The first half feels so disconnected from the last large stanza, just a thought. Otherwise, content is solid! Great write, maybe improvement on structure! 7.5/10! -
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yep..kind of thought the same how the structure was but oh well..i was more concerned about the emotion..Thanks!
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