Broken angels, beatings, wings of butterflies,
churches towards our own self-hating
keeping us alive....
Tearing down the structured features,
wearing away our outer beauty,
to mirror all our inner lies...
Don't you feel the cold is closing in....
Don't you feel the cold is cutting you again...
I speak...to myself...the only conversation I will ever understand
I am feeding...upon the blood I'm bleeding, upon the sanity I'm leaving...
upon this....self...
At a loss, for humanity...
I'm dead inside...this...insanity...
my ears are ringing from profanity,
I know and hear and feel and see,
the decadency, forever will I be because...
I speak....to myself...the only consecration of my mind that i will stand
I am feeding....upon the tears I'm bleeding from my eyes of blinded sight...
upon this....self...
You never understand....
the things I tried to say...
you asked...you pleaded...you cut...your heart, to pieces...
just so I would say...
but you turned away...
Every little moment I thought that I would change
is reverting...
to this...old...self...
of mine...
The one I thought I was finally leaving behind!
I stand and then I fall,
the beauty has been seen,
the beast is still in me...
no matter how far I push it away...
The state of being homeless....the state of being cold....
the state of being...me...myself.....
Returns....here...
Someday...isn't here...
Author notes
So I had been pondering for awhile whether this girl I know is someone be with me.
I like her very much so,
I had the rational feeling that she did indeed like me...
Everything pointed to it, I took time to check into a few things to see.
I am unsure, but I think my descision to tell her my feelings was a bad choice...
I realize, I had to run off, right after i told her I literally had to go right then.
But her reaction was not what I had expected.
she seemed flustered, very, caught off guard.
Like I had been dropping obvious hints...
it kinda scares me alittle.
~sighs~
I think I put myself right back into a bad position.
but, we shall see.
anyway, thats where this comes from.
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