I try to wipe my forehead, I'm desperate to move my hair from my eyes, but my hands are tightly bound. The last I can remember is er..erm let me think. That's it, I was on my way home from a girls night out, celebrating my best mates birthday. It wasn't that late, a little after twelve. We had said our goodbyes. Shared a laugh about the geek that had tried to chat us up, it was so funny. Hugging, I turned to her and waved for the last time. I made my way a little further down the well lit street. I'd only got a short way to go, done it many times before, five doors away that was it just five doors. Then THUD! I found myself waking up with a massive headache.
Fuck, the back of my head really hurts. I'm not sure where I am, it's so dark and cold and the smell..the smell is so putrid..to be honest it smells like rotting flesh, it makes me gag. I keep trying not to breathe through my nose...but this smell is one you can taste. Oh, God...I'm so scared.
It's just so dark in here, I can't see anything apart from a single ray of light that is filtering in through what looks like a poorly boarded up window. It doesn't give off enough light to get my bearings..it just lets me know that the world is out there and I am stuck in this hell hole, alone. I'm not even sure how long I've been down here. I want to scream but I daren't. Shout for help...but the fear stops me. The fear of not knowing. Then I hear it again the dragging noises that come from above me. I can here talking now, crying, a scream, a shrill high pitched scream. I want to put my hands to my ears...drown out the noise...there it is again. It's blood curdling...
I can feel my heart pounding against my chest trying to escape the terror. I try to move again it's impossible. I can feel my body shake as my heart pounds, thuds even harder, tears start to well and roll down my cheeks. I scream to myself inside my head. Why...why me? As I hear the thud thud thud from heavy boots hitting wooden steps. There's a flash of light, I see a figure standing above me, he strokes the side of my face...he seems so caring, I don't understand.
"It's such a shame it has to come to this," he whispers. "You are such a pretty little thing, but you shouldn't have laughed at my son." Again he strokes my face, as he leans over me his voice takes on a more menacing tone. "You will pay for humiliating him. Did you hear your friends screams?"
I try to answer but I can't - it's just muffled sounds spinning in my head. Again the darkness closes in as he replaces the coffin lid. He walks away thud, thud, thud up the wooden steps laughing...
In a list
A contest entry
- Best Written Prewrites - BOTH Stories and Poems!! by Vanishing - - Soul.
675 points, ended September 21, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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Wow, a very dark story and I like it! The language is beautiful as well. Well done for this write. It's nothing I would have expected but that's what makes it even more special! Wonderful! Thanks for entering and good luck!
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Very dark, eerie and what a story you penned here my friend.
To me hanging on deaths door, shall she live or die ?
Great
Julie
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Thanks julie.
Appreciate you reading, glad you enjoyed
~sugar~
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Michelle this is just brilliant and not something, I expected to see from you. I found myself absolutely caught up in the feel of this. Fantastic read very compelling. Emma
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Thanks hon. Always a pleasure to have you read
~sugar~
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Best story write ever!
Descriptive, emotionally compelling with interesting characters, you have everything in this. This is a short story stlye that is publishable. Please, do something with this.
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Thank you for your fab comment...you're a treasure.
I wouldn't know where to begin..I'm not confident enough.
I really do appreciate your support, valued immensely.
Love ~sweetness~ xxx
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SOUNDS LIKE An ERRIE 'TALE FROM THE CYRPT' to me ! HE! HE!
I believe the moral to this story is NEVER LAUGH AT a NERD or a GEEK for you never know what his Father or Mummy may be - and as I said before this would make a nice half hour episode of TALES FROM THE CRYPT that I used to watch many moons, ago! The two woman in the tale would have to big breasted and run around topless and SCREAMING, of course before they were hit over the head with a silver hammer from the Twisted Father who worked as a simple carpenter by day for dramatic effect! HE! HE!
Love & Peace!
Earl.
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I don't know about it continuing this part of me is well hidden. I have to dig deep I'm too
ic 
I love the tales from the crypt WICKED! Trust you to want half clad women running round screaming 
And you tell me to BEHAVE! 
Thanks baby for a fab comment, always appreciate you to the max. Love you ~sugar~ xxx
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Someone needs a spanking! HE! HE!
And this time I suspect that it may be me! HE! HE! Funny how we run away from them when we're young and foolish, Sugar - but when to them as we grow older, sexier, and wiser! HE! HE!
I can't help but being naughty as the rewards are heavenly, indeed!
Love & Peace!
Earl. -
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You leave too many innuedo's even in your none naughty pieces...But then again that could be me with me head in the gutter
what's a girl to do? Get down and naughty like her pet...it's so much more fun.
Love you ~sugar~
xxx
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It looks like you may need a spanking, too!
Ladies first. Baby? HE! HE! -
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Assuming the position, baby (_$_) < Bare and ready
LMAO! He! He!
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What in tha????
oh my goodness, now I have questions 
is this REALLY me cookie?
I am so proud of your progress sis, words can not express my feelings. This is absolutely incredible and I love it 
I wished you and Wayne had entered your latest pieces in my contest
I love these the most of all.
Keep being inspired my sweetness sis
-piff
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A light bulb pinged in me head last night, and kicked started my brain into some sort of action.
I think this COOKIE is starting to crumble LOL!!!
Thanks sis for your fabuloso comment appreciate you through and through
Lubb ~sugarcookie~
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Brilliant dark story. Great imagery and feelings of overpowering helplessness and despair. You caught the atmosphere just right. This was a frightening piece of dark writing. Well done Sugar.
Dark
Wishes
Wayne Leon
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Appreciate you hon.
Thank you for your fab comment...for giving me continued support as I dabble with my dark side. Means so much.
Love always ~sugar~ xxx
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