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Typhoon Queen



Water garnished wails,
echo throughout the castle.
As antagonized angels,
kindle her baneful ferocity.

Swindling each other,
out of sumptuous time.
Until the goddess chortles,
lounging elegantly,
savoring every heart.







Author notes

Prompt:
Option #1(photobucket)

30 words
Acrostic

A contest entry

Please critique my work if you feel this needs improving

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
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Comments

1 - 7 of 7
  • well penned dark imagery in this poem
  • this is a very dark poem.. I loved the the last stanza..
    I really enjoyed your take on the prompt..

    good luck

    kat

  • "Water garnished walls"
    Wonderful verb use with 'garnished'.

    "baneful ferocity"
    Makes me think of Bane the centaur in Harry Potter...awesome!!

    "sumptuous time"
    Like this.

    Truly dark...good luck (:

  • oh my...how dark and decadent!!!!

    "water garnished wails">>>now that, is a cool phrase

    seriously, so dark!!!!

    hmm...not so sure of the word "demoralizing'>>>doesn't sit quite proper with me...

    "savoring every heart">>>>>>how devious and dulcet!!
    I really like where you took this!

    it's very different from the other's that I've read

    well done!!
    I LOVE LOVE it!!!


    You'll do well!

    Sailor Ptolema

  • Ooooo very dark and delicious! Love where you took this pic!

  • Swindling each other,
    out of sumptuous time.
    Until the goddess chortles,
    lounging elegantly,
    savoring every heart.


    hehe i like that great take on prompt..... thanks for sharing this and goood luck in contest.....!
  • Wow, this was definitely original... I loved your take on the prompt! Good luck, and much love!

    Laura x

1 - 7 of 7