These taxi cabs fly past me like gnats
Preoccupied
To preoccupied to stop and say hello
She’s only after the glow
Zap!
She’s dead and takes part of me with her
I’ve always given the milk away for free
What’s it matter they always scatter when it comes to collection day
Ashes to ashes
Dust to dust
I threw my last pack of good smokes in her casket
It’s the way she would have wanted it
I walk beer can streets
Where hookers creep
Rent by the hour
Kick the STD sleet from my bare feet
She was tattered women
Like a waitress she’s only flattered when tipped
She’s the record store in every romantic comedy
She’s beautiful
I’ve been sold
Out
For weeks
This cabby drives me like a cloud
Nameless, faceless
I would break the mirror, but the fear of seven years diverts my eyes
Superstition a position of power
Muhammad swerves to hit a black cat
Saying that the foreshadowing will cost me twenty more
Stale cigarette
Click, click
The triggers jammed
Looking over my shoulder for whomever for whatever
Fire
Scorch the tip
Sherman’s marching to my frontal lobe
A bottle of aspirin
Nothing to serious
It won’t kill me
It’s a cry for help
Attention is a cranberry
Bitter and tart but so refreshing
A contest entry
- I Shouldn't Love You by pattyann4500.
900 points, ended July 6, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - make me feel something. by aanika.
1003 points, ended July 20, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Teens & Young Adults by DAMSELx.
300 points, ended August 30, 2008, 101 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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It's been a long time since I read your work, but I still love it. You make well worn imagery like cigarettes and record stores feel fresh and original here.
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I love this. Very Descriptive, I love it! you should win!
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Ahah...I truly adore this, and I genuinely hope you win the contest, this is a lovely piece...such vivid descriptions...grand wording, almost humorous in parts...hmm...I love...well...everything about it, I suppose...besides your small grammatical errors...I hate those...but no matter, a few "to"s cannot stop the message.
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I like this though it's quite depressing. I like all of the descriptions and metaphors in here. I like the way this is written. The last stanza fits perfectly and the descriptions are great. wonderful write and good luck in the contest.
~Steph
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