Continually consulting
the oracle of vantages;
Treating the abomination,
fixing what has no remedy...
Shunned away the procedures
don't mind the sympathy;
Quite idiotic of you to be my paramedic...
This heart is false...
Serve me a quatum of ordinary
and give me a taste to chill my bones;
Medicate me a happy smile
and create the reaction,
you perceived from the start;
Begin with bottled freedom
and end it properly with a song,
we all knew this execration
would've never belonged...
~♥~
Author notes
3. X Amount Of Words
"Your brain is faulty wiring
the reason for tiring
Keep treating the curse,
Imagine the worst
Systematic, sympathetic
Quite pathetic, apologetic, paramedic
Your heart is prosthetic
A plate of quite peculiar
On a dish of my own
A tablespoon of feather
tickle me to the bone
Give me recipes for happy
with the chemicals gone
Drinking freedom from a bottle
to the tune of belong"
©Blue October
XXVampireeyesXX
In a list
A contest entry
- I came to 'Bring The Pain'... {{Lyrical Angst)) by PerfectImperfection.
525 points, ended July 9, 2008, 10 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - anything & prewites by whos my humblepie.
600 points, ended July 20, 2008, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Emotion of Darkness by Strawberry Wolf.
450 points, ended July 21, 2008, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Never Again Will This Hurt Me
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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"this heart is false" for some reason...that simple line really stood out. great work and good luck
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great work! it was amazing!! Good luck in the contest!
-
This line confuses me a bit:"This heart is a false..."
It may be because of the 'a' you had added.
Don't fret, you're in the finalists list.
But please work on that line.
-
To the point examination of depth and thought to lyric. Well composed. I even had to look up a word (YAY I learned something lol)! Nice interpretation of song itself. Thanks for your entry & Best wishes in the contest!
-
Amazing
This is an excellent poem. You have an incredible amount of talent and insight. Your work is really remarkable. My favorite lines were:
Serve me a quatum of ordinary
and give me a taste to chill my bones;
Medicate me a happy smile
and create the reaction,
you perceived from the start;
It is amzazing that some people are only happy when they can re=create you in the image of what they want you to be.
Great job.
Adding your comment:
1 - 5 of 5
