I sit here gazing up at you
Your crumbling walls
Are crying out
Your inner heart
Feels grazed and bruised
You shouldn't have to feel this way
It's not your fault
You've been misused.
You should have been a stately mansion
Or lacking that
Then something special
A farm house maybe
All rustic and real
A place with stories
Ripe to tell.
Instead they filled you
With the sick and ill,
And now you sit there
Awaiting doom
If I could stop them
I surely would
But I'm just one person
And it's just no good.
So as you meet your tepid end
Know that I'll miss you
My childhood friend.
A contest entry
- White Houses! by stylization.
450 points, ended July 13, 2008, 5 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
Lovely
Wow. This certaintly was an original take on the prompt, and a well-done one at that. I like the way you compare the derelict house to what it should be but isn't. I only suggest that you hit "enter" twice at the end of the poem, to create a space between the last line and the bar. But the poem itself is very good. Thanks for entering and best of luck! -
-
thank you
thank you so much for your comment it means a lot.
i have done as you suggested, thanks for pointing it out
((((((((hugs)))))))) joss xx
-
Adding your comment:
