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Invitation

With wisps of the sea and
chanting from the sky,

I hear the near innocent moan

burning the sky with Hell's breath
keen to cut free
from searing tethering crest.

Grasping, amidst slithery stone

Trying to escape the recesses
of eternal darkest depths.
Splashing upon mercurial shore,
beckoning me

with the warmest wave

Hither thy come,
go back to your grave...

So shall I walk once again
to test the waters.


Author notes

http://angelreich.deviantart.com/art/Sunset-83282317

as per picture.

A contest entry

say what?

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • sailor ptolema
    July 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a really great take. I was wondering how you were going to go with this, as I thought it could prove difficult.. But you've far exceeded my expectations!! Now, because I am pressured for time I can't leave as long of a comment as I'd like ....

    "keen to cut free
    from searing tethering crest.">>>I really like your word choices here, trying to get away from the sucking power of the waves....a great image, LOVE all the words here, you use tight diction and I like that a lot.

    "
    Grasping, amidst slithery stone">> NOW i love this, trying to stay on the beach, but to no avail, because the stones are coated in a slippery foam..... and slithery,...gives a dark impression, I get the image of the serpent tempting, and watching someone get sucked into his lies....You've conjured up a strong image.

    This is great.
    thank you for entering and g'luck!

    S.P. !~


  • OnceUponAMind silver member
    July 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh!! Wicked Picture you had to work with!!

    You'r write is very intense, just as sharp and a bit twisted like the pic Nice job, and best of luck



  • hoodoolover silver member
    July 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You did an amazing job with the picture you were given, I had a peek before you wrote for this, and thought you had your work cut out for you, lol, little did I know you were gonna knock it outta the park, good on you!


  • Poetic Tasha Moderators member
    July 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    oooh hun great take on the prompt!
    wonderfully done flows nicely, sets a tone. . .
    Bravo. Best ofluck to you.

    Tasha


  • sailor ptolema
    June 30, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    http://angelreich.deviantart.com/art/Sunset-83282317

    ~all my best!

1 - 6 of 6