Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Simply Met


 

Remember when we met

to hold each other.

How we felt all spaces

wake up within us;

each with a voice 

all gathered in time

since the day we were born.

 

Like questions yearning

for answers in response,

invisible ache 

in a love to be known;

all laid yet unattended 

on the bed of our ocean,

buried in our unseen-ness 

with no address found.

 

They hardly raised their heads,

un-apparent until now;

stirred in our approach,

called to wake up, 

heard briefly through tears 

all sighs in clamour.

 

Then feeling our breaths

on each other's;

 

in flood with all answer,

into one huge whole,

filling to completeness,

as satisfaction rushed

upon all concerns,

 

we left them vaporised

irrelevant on the floor,

while elation took us

to orbit so naturally

a central point so elevated

and yet so truly home.

 

Sent in slow spiral of taste

through many colours 

ever closer, knowing

 

even if this our finality

all which ever was, 

remains within this source.

Living in a return,

this universe in our kiss.

 

 

A contest entry

Welcome any sincere response and critique

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? • Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 26 of 26

  • zigdaddy silver member
    July 15
    Edit | Reply
    I thought the judges appropriately chose your write as the winner. Congrats!


  • Ruby34
    July 15

    Edit | Reply
    I knew this was Gold! Congratulations Karim

    Ruby

  • Tender wolf gold member
    July 15

    Edit | Reply

    BREATH TAKING

    for within your tender words a true and loving kiss is born...you hold this reader in your hands and has begging for more...niaish so very much for sharing your master piece with me...O' my i have my breath back nowWink


    • Thoughts-of-Soloman gold member
      July 15
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you,

      I can't find words enough right now to say how grateful and honoured I feel, to receive your wonderful comment and award.

      This has made me so happy!

      Wonderful prompt you provided us with also, thank you so much for creating the inspirational 'space' with your contest.

      Ah'... you are great!

      Sol

  • Lucy. gold member
    July 7
    Edit | Reply
    Hurry up then X

  • rhondasail
    July 2

    Edit | Reply
    ...a perfect kiss... I am speechless and breathless and awed by the Light...Peace always, Rhonda


  • Suzanne Dia gold member
    July 2

    Edit | Reply


    I like to find poetry written by men that expresses love so tenderly. It is a rare thing, at least in my experience.

    Even with finality, this is gorgeous and touches that soft part of the underbelly we try so hard not to expose.




    • Thoughts-of-Soloman gold member
      July 2
      Edit | Reply
      I confess, that I did have a moments hesitation, you're so right about the 'exposed underbelly' feeling when venturing into this direction of writing.

      Thanks for your such kind words Suzanne.

      Sol


  • Lucy. gold member
    July 1
    Edit | Reply
    It's perfect! X


  • NurseChilly gold member
    July 1

    Edit | Reply
    sigh sigh sigh... most beautiful and deliciously told too.. well done luv

    Gilly.xxx


    • Thoughts-of-Soloman gold member
      July 1
      Edit | Reply
      I wish you could hear my "thank you" when I say it.
      Don't you ever think it's funny, how it can be read as anything 'really heartfelt' to just 'words filling a gap from politeness'. Anyway we know each other and... Thank you x

  • Dalaney gold member
    June 30

    Edit | Reply
    What I always seem to wonder when I first meet someone is, (and don't think I am too weird) "What would it be like to be in love with him?" This poem gave to me a sense of a possibility for love, the newness of love, a huge universe suddenly revealed because of love. It's a good poem, Solomon. I like this. Love, Lane


    • Thoughts-of-Soloman gold member
      June 30
      Edit | Reply
      I believe you are a very generous person Lane, not weird at all but exceptional because I'm not sure how many would extend such generous attention in wishing to understand and know the people we meet.

      Thanks so much for your such encouraging comment.

      Sol


  • subliminal girl
    June 30

    Edit | Reply
    Wonderful write, so full of love...
    I really enjoyed the imagery ... great take on the prompt, best of luck to you!


  • PurringKitten
    June 30

    Edit | Reply

    AWESOME

    you have held me captive between your words and now this heart lies beckoning at your feet...sighs...the perfect poem! how can i thank you for sharing such beauty with me winner wrote all over it sighs


    can i have my breath back now~


    • Thoughts-of-Soloman gold member
      June 30
      Edit | Reply
      ... Please... of course!

      You know, this felt like a very different area for me, in terms of writing about personal feelings and I felt a little hesitant about posting it. Now, it is my thanks to you for such a wonderful comment received.

      Much appreciated

      Sol

  • Ruby34
    June 30
    Edit | Reply
    This is so deep..You're too much

    What a perfect kiss 'this universe in our kiss'

    It is hot in here..I come back

    Ruby

1 - 26 of 26