God why did u make me a girl ?
To make me feel like a gem or a pearl?
But if it is so , then why do I feel the pinch,
Whenever I see the place of women in society every inch.
We do not have liberty , we do not have freedom ,
And if we have then we have it seldom.
That’s a true fact that a girl is no less than a boy,
But then why the feeling that I am a girl forces me to annoy?
Why do we girls have an inferior place in society ?
Just answer this GOD , to silent my anxiety.
Why have you given all the strength , liberty and franchise to men?
Now answer my question why have you gone and get yourself hidden in the den?
This proves that GOD you yourself are not a girl
And belong to the category of MEN!
- Ankita Ashesh
Author notes
This poem is dedicated to all the women who are struggling for a place of recognition in society .
A contest entry
- BEST PREWRITE QUICKIE by AbidoodleCullen.
460 points, ended January 26, 48 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrites Contest by tears.of.silence.
1000 points, ended April 18, 401 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
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Well why it is true about how most women feel, it is up to you to make yourself better. No one can make you feel inferior but yourself. Your poem is quiet provoking I will admit that.On the wow factor I give your poem a 20. You ended with a total of 70 points in the contest. Thank you for entering and the best of luck to you. Kahy
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I completely agree with you that no one can make us feel inferior but ourselves , but I would like to mention this was insight to the culture in society and nothing personal . I love the individual I am and am proud of myself .
Thanks for your comment .
-Ankita A.
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This was REALLY exceptionally great!
Thanks for entering and good luck!
<3 Abi -
Interesting and thoughtful
I never allow anyoneto put me in a place I don't like, that they think is my place. I find all to often - those that claim no freedom, decide not to allow themselves it. Slaves found it by runningaway, fugitives for other places run for the things they want. Women have fought long and hard and slowly are getting the equality deserved. Itis a never ending fight, as therewill always be those who try to take something from you.
Nice write
W W -
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Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment . I completely agree with you for everything you wrote .
Take Care - Ankita A.
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Huh. That was something else I didn't expect. A person that throws me off guard, is a person makes me think. That was good nice work. I like it. Good luck.
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Hello Ankita,
first of all, u never mention ur name in an anonymous contest.
The poem is quite good and I agree with you but its not what I wanted. better luck in next contest.
thanks for entering
good luck
-Neha
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Your rhyme here is very good and the individual lines are well metered but there seems to be a lack of continuity through the poem. I like a lot of the ideas and they are well expressed. Good poem!!
This contest ends our series but we both hope you continue to rhyme and flow and look out for more "Dalaney" branded contests and others we will run alongside them.
Keep rhyming and flowing
Jeff and Sue
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Rhythm seems to slip in and out. Not really feeling this as spoken Word.
Great Passion
While I personally don't see it as God's fault for our choices, the message was consistent.
Thank you for your entry. -
nice
good question--life is tuff.
thanks for entering--good luck! -
a strong powerful write...well done
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Very true in most respects, but can i ask...... What makes this poem wierd??
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its weird for me .. because i am not able to digest the fact that today as we stand on the threshold of a new millennium "21st" century women are still struggling for a place of recognition in some parts of the world including the place where i live ....whereas in other parts this is not the case .....so its weird for me coz i want to know which crisscross lines on my hand made me so unfateful that i have to bear with such discrimination....but i am sorry if my poem couldnt convey my feelings......u may DQ me !!!
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I won't DQ you because it is only my opinion.
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Hi. I found this poem quite upsetting to read, and I felt sad that a woman would feel like this. I personally don't... although I know what you mean, because according to the Bible only men should be pastors etc. which I think it very unfair.
I thought the rhyme in this poem was very good, and I thought it was very well written. However, I don't know if it was really 'weird' as such... but maybe you can tell me why it is??
'That’s a true fact that a girl is no less than a boy,
But then why the feeling that I am a girl forces me to annoy?
Why do we girls have an inferior place in society ?
Just answer this GOD , to silent my anxiety.'
Thanks for entering.
skitza
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well expressed........
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thank you sir so much ....i am glad u read my work .
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I like the concept very much but think that here and there the rhyme is forced; such as when you use the word pinch to rhyme with inch. It feels as though you word just to rhyme ... thank you for entering.
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I liked the rhyme.
Good piece!
keep it up.
Good luck. -
Intrigueing!
Has not been my experience in life thus far... it is to my opinion that woman are very strong behind the scenes, and even up front. I don't believe in God, only in "Mother" Nature,but I don't think she is to blame either...
I am one who strongly believes in equality, domination and supremacy's are so out dated. But still gender seems to always gets in the way, now doesn't it? I do hear you though, but it is not men nor God... not even Mother Nature... but it is society and all of its foolishness that have to change... one person at a time, one man, one woman, one will. "EQUALITY"Very thought prevoking... very well penned my fellow poet!
Ron *wolf*
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I usually dont go for rhyme, but I liked the play of words. Simple, but endearing to the heart.
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Very good
The poem ends with a nice statement, God must be a man. The reason is very very simple - because He would be badly in need of a girl, you know why. Don't feel discriminated, men are there only because you - a girl - are there. With everybody you are not inferior, with many you are more than equal. To get over your depressing thought find out someone who will value you as a gem or a pearl. May such a search be successful!
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I really like this. You are looking at your society through your eyes. You see the injustices and the inhumane way in which some women are treated by men. This, I believe, has nothing to do with God, but has everything to do with MAN forcing his will upon women.
They use God as a convienent scapegoat. But remember, was it not God, if I remember, who exhalted Mary? and Bernadette Soubirous, and Joan of Ark?
Maybe they are only stories, but I seem to remember that they were exhalted, not by MAN, but by God. Your piece is thought-provoking and casts many questions. I shall read more of your work.
Dark
Wishes
Wayne Leon
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thanks for your comment. well its not as though i dont believe in the supreme power or i m an atheist.....its jus that things happening in india forces me to write such a poem .....its all true whatever you have written.....but even after reading all this i cannot help myself from sticking to what i hav written.....
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I love rants, this was quite good, but not true for the west, perhaps for the east, like in India, but then they had a woman primeminister.
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yes this poem is actually dedicated to the women of india n the neighboring countries who are still struggling for a place of recognition in the society.....i m really glad there s no such problem in the west..... thanks for your comment.
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It is difficult to read the black print on dark red.
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oh m really sorry for the inconvenience .....i hav changed the background, now u can read the poem n i ll b waiting for ur feedback......thank you.
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