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Lingering

Hope though once grasped,
Slips through numb fingers,
And flies to some above,
Forlorn I,
Still have no answers,
They flew with hope,
To the grey beyond,
Foolish I,
Thought I knew questions,
That were merely lies,
And the light slipped away,
Godless I,
Sink back into my grave,
To dream within the dust,
A grim, dry regret, now,
Revenant I,

Shall linger ever on....

Author notes

Credit art
http://kheleksul.deviantart.com/art/Facing-the-Dark-12897213

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • RiNgMaSt3r
    July 20

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    wow no wonder you won bronze on this poem! it was great. I enjoyed reading this piece and lately i havent been in the mood to read haha great write!


  • azlyn gold member
    July 4

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    Godless I,
    Sink back into my grave,
    To dream within the dust

    How wonderful is this? So much dark feeling in these few words.

    Loved this Jamie.


    Sue


  • marlene47 silver member
    July 3

    Edit | Reply
    I like the movement from sadness through questioning fool to godless and finally to revenant lingering in regret... a grim sinking tale of lost hope.
    Congratulations on the bronze.
    Marlene

  • unsigned gold member
    June 30

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    First time I am reading your work and I must say that I loved the movement and flow oif this short write.

    You worte this with a wonderful sence of sinking back into the shadows tat are my home...

    ~siles~ makes me feel totaly at home...

    Simon


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    June 30

    Edit | Reply
    Such a sense of struggle to linger on, and then the slipping from the light... yet still the ghostly remains linger on! Love the way you've written this, really gave it impact!


  • PerfectImperfection
    June 30

    Edit | Reply
    Ah... A very nice take on the image prompt. Weighted in the abyss of time's unraveling. Thoughtful, and intense. Nice flow to thought. Great write!


  • Midniterose
    June 28

    Edit | Reply
    I like this. It has wonderful imagery and flow, and the effect of your form on your meaning is excellent. It makes me get a beachball of despair in my chest and it makes me lonely and cold. This is really good. Keep it up!

1 - 7 of 7