The nice, unaware hand is extended
And his sight, a cellphone passing by
A pleasant sight of women and women
Going into a hideous, aware eye
A light treasure is caught, unrevealed
Enclosed in that lusty yet sleeping life
Destiny's cruelty was mirroring
It didn't foresee her as his wife
Passing by and over the helper
It couldn't be helped; it was just fate
The second, third, last, this moron
Enjoying the tease, the please, this bait
But the strings were knotted tight enough
An inherited complain about youngsters' will
Diseases and genes exchanged for fun
Entangling foreigners, puppet master's skill
Yet the past, the stories, developed well
The friend, the savior becomes disturbing
Though the end was interrupted by them
An obsession in life's way's tough curbing
The storyline was already displayed
We all know the ending from way before
Breeding and betrayal, seasonings' spice
The one who dies was marked as a plain whore
The angry, starving hand is extended
In his sight, his lovers just passed by
Love was disregarded, destiny's chance
To free him from passion and let him die
Author notes
4. Your least favourite character from anime/manga <- My option. I don't dislike characters in general, but there are always exceptions, this one being Makoto from "School Days", trying to relate the storyline of that series from that point of view. I recommend this anime to everybody who is against cheating.
Yes, I'm from the group Anime Lovers.
I suck at rhyming and with meters.
- Anime Lovers group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Anime Lovers Unite!! by you make me smile.
850 points, ended June 29, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-write-a-pal-ooza by Nicole Hanna.
300 points, ended July 8, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Turn your Green Trophies into Bronze, Silver or Gold (4) by FloridaGatorQueen.
425 points, ended August 5, 2008, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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This is an awesome poem. I like the imagery. I like the way you let your dislike for this charecter come out. Enjoyed the read! Thank you for entering my contest.
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I've never seen School Days but I feel the complexity of the underlying story you are trying to protray. To me it seems Dark & sad. Nice simple ryhmes that add to the telling of the story. I quite like this piece. Well done and Goodluck in the contest
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I like the idea of telling a story with your poem. It almost seems like a summary of a trite stroy, perhaps this is why you do not like this character very much...too much like everyone else.
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good poem while put together
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