remnants of ruined rocking chairs
propped against ashen walls.
layers of memories,
residue on tipped tables.
she died there.
In a list
A contest entry
- 20 words by Melissa Gayle.
1750 points, ended July 1, 39 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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This has a whispered feel to it... maybe just the font! Nice selection of details - furniture remnants, ashy walls, the layering, the residue... the stated understanding. Congratulations on the bronze.
Marlene
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excellent! though I wish the font was a bit larger, I think I am getting old. LOL
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Wow, short, effectively profound..and so real FM...We have come upon a homestead house, dishes left on table and silverware..Jam was unopened..like an unexpected guest came by and they disappeared..How real your poem is! People left alone in their secluded homes and cabins...Left to die when the time comes...Your descriptives are excellent!
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Makes me want to go clean, stain and repair her place. Peel back the layers. Good stuff... bring your toolbox.
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A very impressive poem for only 20 words! A story told full of emotion! Well done!
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oh no why did she die there for o.o *revives her with cpr* hehe a wonderful write and the shortness but effectiveness is super
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