A dark stone
Shimmering in a pool
Piercingly blue
Hints of life glisten upon its surface
This water I would willingly drown in
It could swallow me
Wrap around my every curve
Imprison me in your in stare won’t you?
In those blue that crush my heart
As they fade away
Leaving nothing but a memory
A contest entry
- Lets be Honest by St. Poet.
900 points, ended July 15, 2008, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-writes, new poems, Anything by Never.Give.Up.
525 points, ended September 24, 2008, 104 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
Good poem, it's simple, but I think that is what makes it interesting. The blue waters are obviously the eyes of a lost love (or at least that is what I'm feeling) and you would have done anything for them, but now, all you have left are memories of your times together. It's an interest thing that you chose Drown as a title, because that is very much how love is. Your drowning, rather if it's in that person's love or in the sorrow that you feel after you loose that person. Anyways, once again, good poem, and good choice of title. Very much enjoyed reading it.
-
a good poem - it's surface - no need for the apostrophe there, its works better. it;s is saying it is surface.
i guess we all feel like we are drowning at times, but there is a breath to breathe in and we can live.
Adding your comment:
