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Leaving My Sinful Mistake

Some days I wonder why I'm stuck with you
Though I am your girl
You treat me like I am your maid
Always cleaning up the messes you make

One little thing after another
Sends me into fits of rage
With your immature ways
At the root of all my agony

You treat me like your prize antlers
Hanging upon the wall
Is that all I am too you,
A reward you have won?

Somehow you believe I will always be here
To put up with you
And your foolish ways

I fed up with this,
Your a man acting like a boy
Just because some hot blond
Walks your way

My hairline temper is running short
And I swear I am going to loose my mind
The next time
I find one more candy wrapper on the floor

Your just a greedy pig
You want all the money in the world
And the hottest girls to match
But you don't want me

It's over and I won't shed a tear for you,
The tears that may fall will be
Grieving for your next victim




Author notes

stanza two is wrath
stanza 3 is pride
stanza 5 is lust
stanza 6 is gluttony
stanza 7 is greed and envy
last stanza is sloth or sadness

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Comments


  • Genesis
    August 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for entering. I enjoy reading composites of all seven sins. It's alway interesting to see how people will portray them all together. I really like how you used a failing relationship to get the sins across.
    --Genesis.


  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    June 29, 2008

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    1. Topic touched upon appropriately? - 18

    2. Expressive, Unique, Creative? - 17

    3. Grammar/Spelling correct/appropriate? - 17

    4. Title and opening closing lines well chose? - 17

    5. Personal liking to the poem wrote? - 17


    Total:86

    This reminds me of someone I know pretty well, though he would NEVER admit to it, of course (after all he has the pride on high).