An emerald green to crimson swing
The quiet ones can't be trusted
Their death is designed for pressing.
Under the moon waning pale you bring
Your heart completely busted
An emerald green to crimson swing.
Are you awake, can you hold the bearing?
For all that you have lusted
Their love is designed for pressing.
An oath of trust, a faith worth swearing
For battle your gear's adjusted
An emerald green to crimson swing.
Sometimes, in my dreams you sing,
As I am dying on a grey field rusted
Their love is designed for pressing.
I fought as I loved, an unmeasurable thing
The finger prints can't be dusted
An emerald green to crimson swing
My death was designed for pressing.
Author notes
Written January 2nd, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- Gems [Contest] by rindomai.
500 points, ended March 10, 2006, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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wow... that was AMAZING. not only the set up and format but your word choices, the repetition, the story behind it, the imagery... i could go on and on lol but i need to finish this contest haha. thanks for entering and good luck!!
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Yes, I agree. Very masterfully done. This is an espescially hard form of poetry to write. I, myself find it too tedious sometimes, but you pulled the flow together marvelously. Great job and thanks for entering!
-Lan- -
Excellent.
Whew. You have mastered the villanelle form brilliantly. I really enjoyed your poem. I think your title is very interesting and the poem itself is imaginative and very creative - I like the words that you use to rhyme also. Thankyou for entering the contest. An excellent piece. Well done. -
I'm impressed as well. You seem to have a great sense for poetry and a great way with words. Good luck on the contest! BB Morgaine
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this is a HARD form to do in poetry. you did it very well...I'm impressed
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cool
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