I haven't taken a breath since we last spoke,
And suffocating never felt so good,
But I can't live like this; between moments,
Between spasms of you,
And all the exhaustion of need.
I've thought to call,
But I've never been one to press buttons
Or you.
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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I love this!!!! Short, sweet, emotion, intimacy, and I read it at just the perfect point in my life...
I commend your talent.
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I must say I really like this piece;; the simplicity and length was absolutely perfect. You have a way with getting out so much emotion and putting so much meaning with few lines. I love it :] Keep writing<3
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I agree with previous commenters on this poem -- "between spasms of you, and all the exhaustion of need" are great line. And the simplicity of this poem really serves the content well.
This poem generally makes me curious about the relationship, but content with not knowing. :-) And that, in my opinion, is a good love poem. -
Uh...wow
So short...simple. I like this piece a lot. I've felt this way, as my proverbial 'breath' has been changed because of her; sometimes it messes me up because I only breathe her.
"I've thought to call,
But I've never been one to press buttons
Or you."
I'm so tempted...just to hear her voice...such a sweet sound to my soul. This is so descriptive, making breathing and suffocating the opposite end of Libra's scales. Very nice write, 8/10!
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I love this poem. You can really feel the intimacy in it. I love how you said
"Between spasms of you"
That was a great way to put things. Really great job.
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