-Age 3-
The colours painted on my skin,
are not from fancy dress parties
and spray paints, like the other girls.
-Age 6-
Daddy told me he hated me today
and wished I was never born;
I called my teacher a whore today,
as I've heard daddy say it before.
-Age 9-
My Daddy told me loves me today
and his lips touched mine - been ages
since he showed he cared and then,
his hands touched somewhere else
and when I tried to move away,
he got angry-so I stopped pushing
and he made me cry...
But he told me I was his princess forever after
and bought me a big chocolate cake with sprinkles.
-Age 12-
Dad said I'm a useless bitch
and nobody should ever care about me,
because I refused to touch him -
though he made me anyway.
He hit my head against the wall
and spat on me, so I dug my nails
deep into my skin to stifle the pain.
-Age 15-
My father bought me a new phone
and some fresh new clothes, I was so glad
and then it dawned on me. He took me inside
and laid me on his bed and he raped me
and left me feeling dead and numb.
When he left, I pulled about his bathroom razor
and sliced through my skin, a better way
to feel something other than tears.
-Age 18-
I'm leaving home today; bags packed
and Dad is taking me to the airport -
I fear leaving Mumma alone but I have to,
I cannot heal around our home,
his actions haunt me every day.
-Age 48-
I have an 18 year old daughter now
and she knows no pain, like I did;
but the tears still come at night,
when the nightmares awake me,
from his cold vice like grip upon my body,
I know they'll never go away.
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