falling with slow motion grace
placidly I belly flop on familiar ground
unaware of the breakdown of my circumstance
for there's yelling in my mind
echoing the reality of yesterdays
and I am subject to hear my humiliation
repeatedly, a noiseless waterfall in my mind
my encounters steadily undoing my laces
so that I trip over myself to fall flat
into this pit of despair
unconscious scripts playing out
ignorant of how to catch myself
suddenly I awaken penniless and shaken
I should have known, but didn't think I was human
Author notes
This is about my experiences of being at a very difficult job that kept eroding my sense of self esteem to the point of suddenly waking up to feeling depressed. All the time, I thought I should have been able to handle constant conflict, being yelled at by others, people trying to get me fired because I was a threat to them, consistent negative interactions at multiple levels and a sense of insecurity of what I was doing. For some reason, I thought I could be superhuman enough to handle it all and not be negatively affected.
Comments
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Wow! This is so powerfully written. What imagery! Gosh...is this your last job? I am so glad that you are OUT of there!!!
Good job writing this and getting it out. It looks like you can see the bigger picture here.
I reread it to try and pick out a favorite metaphor...but I couldn't. I relate to so much of it and really like the way you worded it all. Phew!
Good write!
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Yes, this poem was inspired by my experiences at my last job. However, the description of this experience is something that I've been through multiple times.
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