(Show me your depth, nocturne; brandish her core.
I knew of the less and now wish of the more.
Seething and sore.
Be Gold drifting sifts? I'll be not but bored…)
…though, were she a rock, which stone might she be?
Surely not Amber, with tones lent to greed.
Surely not Emerald, scarred jade of conceit.
Nor Zircon, whose shine belies eyes of the cheap.
I dare say not diamond, for so hard a shell
revolts an attraction that may have befell.
I pray not for Topaz (more precious than rare),
She'll swell and compel an increase in the wear.
Not Rubies or Opals; Sapphires or Quartz,
Their names are all uttered twixt common and forced.
But if a Stalactite… so visually plain…
Sha'dowed and abrasive, yet growing with age.
An icon of wisdom, suspended by rain.
Consumed by the cold and composed to maintain
an elaborate essence, compelled ere for gain.
Such a rock would she be.
So Prestige.
So Plain.
~ Oxide Slain ~
© 2008
Author notes
I ask only one thing: Do not read the words. Whisper them.
Comments
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Dude, that was beautiful! I'm not usually one for rhyme, but you did it perfectly! It didn't feel forced or cheap, and your sense of diction showed through this piece. The whole idea is sweet, and you articulated the message well. How you came up with all those names of precious stones, I don't know. Maybe you're more acquainted with them then me! *rofl* Thanks for sharing!
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Great work, this desearves a lot more attention than it has recieved, the flow of the poem shows your natural talent for words and the story of thought was really intregueing and worth the time spent writing.
If there is anything to work on here its the 4th line, "i'll be not but bored" isn't easy to read, but having said that, if you can get your toungue around the first stanza it makes for really good reading.
thanks for the read.
One Angry Monkey
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welcome to alloetry
wow, that was quite the poem.I love the metaphor and alliteration in it. well said, or whispered as the case may be. thanks for sharing this with us here and for joining the site.keep penning,
cheers
Grey
Site Greeter
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