Sparking to life
The birth of a child
The heat of a newly lit flame
So it is and will be
For as time goes on
This life, this flame will grow
Doused with water
Hit with a pain
Slowly shrinking
Into darkness
Into the cold
The flame dies out
A natural death
And the small embers
That burn so dimly
Are naught
But a faded memory
Let the embers keep burning
A contest entry
- whootness!! Options!! =D by Technicolor.
300 points, ended July 5, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
So?
Comments
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Nice poem. I like how the embers are a metaphor for.. embers of life. And, the part:
"So it is and will be
For as time goes on
This life, this flame will grow"
is a great little part. (I would say stanza, but.. there aren't any breaks..)
I can really get some good imagery from this piece.
Nice job! Good luck! -
Wow... I can relate to this poem. I've been thinking of life and death a lot lately because a friend of mine just had a child and it seems like such a miracle to me. I love the fire and water metaphor. It seems to work really well here. I didn't expect the last line. It was like a bit of opinion thrown into a thought of how things are in this world. It was very well written and I enjoyed reading it. Good luck in the contest.
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