Tiptoeing shadows,
Remembering my strangled heart.
You cut me open.
So I traced your lips
With my blade.
They lay in a red box;
Only I can see you smile now!
Remembering my strangled heart.
You cut me open.
So I traced your lips
With my blade.
They lay in a red box;
Only I can see you smile now!
Author notes
Prompt: I caught your smile to keep in my box of forever
[permission for 1 word over...lol!!!]
A contest entry
- 7 entries, 30 words #7 by notorious.
400 points, ended June 22, 7 entries
Honorable winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
honesty always appreciated
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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Wow,
Very potent for this short versed contest.
Well done sweet soul.
Your


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Good one.. great to read u after so long. Sorry for not being very frequent in AP... dunno, been cut off some how.
Love, Bob.

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grisley .... reminding me of Hannibal the cannibal lol. great take on the prompt.
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I love the visual of a strangled heart, but nothing matches the one of a surgically removed smile.
Vile in its beauty and brokeness of an item that could've kept things whole by being apart.

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Oh my!...a bit dark for me!
I am a creature of light and happiness so I found this write to be dark and heavily atmospheric..however that does not detract from its quality..a good write...Dad xx

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dark and lovely! Well done and the best of luck in the contest
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Wow - amazing.


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Wow...talk about being angry....damn! This is way dark.
Congrats to you...I see a winner.
Best of luck. 
~Kystal Angel

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i just don't do lovey dovey that great these days...not really. so, best way to go...the exact other side
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LoL, you must have read me saying I'd be impressed by turning a seemingly happy prompt into something this gruesomely dark.
Kudos to you.
Okay, I'm officially disturbed--your imagination is clearly vivid and raw, or at least it is here...!
"Remembering my strangled heart."
Great verb usage with 'strangled'...and unique phrasing here.
That ending is truly creepy. Quite a movie you have here...
Thanks for entering.
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taiinfinite
great words i like this very much great take good luck

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