The serenity of the night sky.
The deafening silence.
The haunting beauty.
My hand gently caresses your face
And we are lifted to the realms of the universe.
You slip away, floating gracefully,
And I follow, slowly, peacefully,
Knowing you will lead me in the right direction.
The stars align and you shield my eyes from the light.
I want to see it,
But I know you would not mislead me.
You take my hand as we are pulled by its intensifying force..
And we arrive in a new dimension.
A dimension of beauty and peace.
Forever here we'll stay.
Author notes
Author: chrstn
Butter!!
A contest entry
- whootness!! Options!! =D by Technicolor.
300 points, ended July 5, 2008, 10 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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The first stanza creates tons of imagery.
In the second, you spelled 'caresses' wrong...
I like the fourth stanza as well--what are you being avoided from?
Good luck
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This is a wonderful piece. The imagery is very easy to imagine, and I like it.
"You take my hand as we are pulled by its intensifying force.." I think, for some reason, this is the best part, image-wise. I'm not sure, but something about it just sounds very cool. =]
The part of "My hand gently carresses your face
And we are lifted to the realms of the universe." seemed to be the weak point in the piece. Still good, just, lesser than the rest of the piece.
Good luck in the contest!
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