painted my door today
blue gray, like morning
on the western ridge
mizz martha brought me a jar
of her blackberry jelly, no seeds
we had coffee on the porch,
rocked and laughed, at
her stories of yesterdays
and her painted knuckles
A contest entry
- simple things by Cat.
2100 points, ended July 8, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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a beautiful gentle voice to this, very intimate and "simple"...
the jelly having no seeds makes this real...
a fine entry here
al -
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Thanks
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i love the keen sense of humor present here- love that you painted the story without
over-explaining it
this could have been handled so poorly but in your deft hands this turned out
so nicely - love it.
m
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Thanks
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This is so lovely. A quiet moment in time, while the paint dries.
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lol..I hope that doesn't mean it was dull as watching paint dry...
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really, very nice!!!
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Thanks Yay! a poem
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great ending. Another simple moment, loved this one too.
Can't think of anything to critique here. Nicely done.
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Didn't you have painted knuckles too, N.C.?
I cant paint without painting myself.
Cool cameo
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face,hair,knuckles...not from knocking on a door though, lol Thanks Ga.
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This was just the right touch of humor, love and life.
Love, Tom B.
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i enjoyed all that was this...
great martha moment
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cleverly written
you pulled us in with lovely imagery, and then led us
to that last line....inspiring much thought....
and her painted knuckles!
That was impactful...i bet we all will listen to that
conversation to see what she holds inside!
ears/Seattle cleverly done..so many ways to read into it! lovely imagery too!
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Simple and perfect.
Becky
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Lovely Deb, absolutely gorgeous.
'Blue gray, like morning on the western ridge' is just a classic line.
The 'mizz martha' line was timeless, and the end line was superb.
Great stuff!
PJ
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