I miss things about you
I miss the feeling, like I can't live without you
But now I've learned that I can
Living life under something other
Than your iron clad plan
I miss the feeling of your love
Before it was "conditional"
I miss the good times that we had
Without wondering if, tomorrow
It was going to make me feel bad
I miss giving you a hug
Without having the rug pulled
Out from under me
I miss things about you
I miss the look in your eyes
Before the were filled with rage
Our times alone together
Without wondering weather
You were going or staying
I miss things about you
But not the games you were playing
I miss our long conversations
Before they turned into screaming sessions
You said it was teaching me a "lesson"
But all it did was lessen my bond with you
I miss that you used to brag on me
Now all it is, is rag on me
Am I really that bad?
Did you really hate the times we had?
I never pointed out, those
Things about you
The way you hurt me
Hurt people around us
Or the lies, you spread about me
Did I really give you,
That much reason to doubt me?
I don't miss things about you
Like the words you called me
"Bitch", "Liar", "Abuser", "Loser"
I don't miss things about you
Like all the violence
The hitting, the hurting
The beating, the burning
I miss things about you
I miss the feeling
Like I can't live without you...
...But now I've learned that I can
Author notes
They say it takes the abused years, if ever to confront their abuser. Often the victim feels they are the cause, or they deserved what they got. This is never the case..
It took me 22 years, and a lot of hurt to see that my Mother was abusing me.
It hurts to be without her, it hurts to admit to myself, that she hurt me. ...But the biggest step I can take is admit it to myself, to her, and to my friends and the world around me.
That said.. It is what it is...
Option #1
"I'm moving on, and leaving this dark cloud behind me"
A contest entry
- anything & prewites by whos my humblepie.
600 points, ended July 20, 2008, 39 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anorexia, Bullimic, Self harm? State your feelings! by Lsh-x.
475 points, ended October 2, 2008, 31 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - FAMILY TIES by cazzy71.
943 points, ended July 25, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Suicide and Pain by earthlover0915.
800 points, ended September 7, 167 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 24 of 24
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sad
What an honest,clear ,emotion filled poem.With sadness,angst,pure,raw emotion.A brave entry. -
Sad to hear all that happening to you
Well done
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Thankyou for your entry
The repeated use of the word 'I' gives this an edgyness that is enchanting.A powerful piece.Thank you -
This is an awesome poem. I like the message you bring out. It is good you got away from the abuse. I enjoyed the read!!! Thank you for entering my contest
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You have entered a very heartfelt poem into this contest. Abuse is something that asks a lot of strength and time to get over it - if not to admit it...
You have written your heart out very well here!
Leander -
Abuse is never easy or fun. I read a statistic somewhere that 1 our of every three people are or have been abused in some way shape or form. How sad is that?
This was very heartfelt it had a lot of good questions in it and interesting thoughts coming from it. It made me think and remember.
Thanks for entering! -
Wow, personal and heart walming.
Well done! <3 -
a very personal piece peppered with after thought's sentiments, great read, thanks
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You did a great job at this. I loved how you put "I miss the feeling of your love
Before it was "conditional""
and
"I miss our long conversations
Before they turned into screaming sessions"
you have done a great job at showing your emotions and feelings. thank you and good luck :] -
Thank you for entering and submitting this very personal piece. I appreciate that you chose this piece above any other you have done. Thank you again for sharing.
I enjoy the way this poem flows and begins to leave the pages and follow the reader into their senses. I could feel what was going on by reading this poem. The emotions came off the page and left a deep sensation with me. This is what poetry is about, getting the reader to feel things they may not have before.
Your poem has done just that. Thank you for sharing.
Typo:
Before the were filled with rage --> Before they were filled with rage -
deffinately great! i loved how you described what you were feeling. it really put a pic in my head. i'm sorry about your mom. i'm closest to my mom so that is the hardest.
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Very well put. It's a hard thing to understand and reconcile.
Thanks for entering. -
You have really captured some raw emotion, and the confusion as you try to understand how someone could be so loving in one instant, then so ornery in the next.
You have a couple of small grammatical errors. In the third stanza, third line, should be "they". Same stanza fifth line should be "whether".
Great write, thank you for entering the contest. Good luck.
♥
whisper
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emotional! Great job!
I miss our long conversations
Before they turned into screaming sessions
You said it was teaching me a "lesson"
But all it did was lessen my bond with you
I miss that you used to brag on me
Now all it is, is rag on me
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aaww
I am sorry you have to go through this.
when I first read it, I thought it was about someone you were in love with then when I read the author's niotes, I found it was about your mother. 
The feelings here and deep and the sadness is raw. It is a sad thing but I am so glad you founf the courage to move on and realize there will be people there for you though this relationship is almost gone. I hope things do get better. congrats on the trophies and good luck in the contest!!
loveees,
transit~
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this is amazing
wow -
Very powerful emotion in this peice. I enjoyed the ending and discovering you don't need the abuse. Thanks for entering and good luck.
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I am so sorry you had to go through this pain. I can't imagine what it felt like, but I hope everything is better now and I am glad that you have the courage to face everything you have gone through.
this is a heartbrekaing piece, and it hurt to read this. powerful, and intense. great work here and good job.
wishing you the best of lucks
checkmate
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We can always live without that comulsive feeling of I can't live without you. Kind of an obsession...unhealthy really. Thank you for the entry
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ooh
this is such a painful write! first when i read it, i thought it was something about your lover leaving you and how much you'd miss the good times, but once i read further i started to realise it wasnt! i'm sorry that you had to go through all this agony, but i'm glad you've expressed it in a poem! it was touching and gave a ray of hope to those who've been abused! great job, emotionally powerful! keep penning, and thanks bunches for the entry, much luck!
~beauty of silence
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oh yeah, you're a finalist
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line 16 has an error. The poem can use a number of edits done to it but from the message you did bring out so well you should keep in mind that you really should change it beyond a rearranging of some words and removal of unnecessary words.
This is sad and I can empathize the situation well.
It is a difficult matter for the abused, I know from experience both from my mother and eldest brother.
It hurts having so much anger from the injustice.
Your mom may have had a disease of the mind, be it alcohol or a mental disorder. She may have also suffered abuse as a child or from a long term lover. Such habits that an abuser uses is often learned from repeated exposure. this doesn't justify her behavior, but if she had a disease such as aggression, it may help you have a little less anger and pain over the memories.
-hope you don't mind my chattiness.
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you portrayed the sketches of this life..and colored it through the sentiments of your heart..a wonderful piece indeed...
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You go! This was awesome. Relating this to a different situation of my own, I know how you feel. You can never quite tell with people and when it comes down to it you have to tell yourself that it really isn't your fault that they have hatred in their lives. It's their problem and they try to make it yours. You don't have to take that. Good for you for being strong. This is very well worded.
...And I love this line!
"You said it was teaching me a "lesson"
But all it did was lessen my bond with you"
Thank you sooooo much for entering!
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