Maniacs streaking the floor
in early primal rage,
lost in newfound freedom
after leaving the stifling cage.
They're doing the sanity stomp
to their own syncopated beat
as their energy rises
to their own maddening heat
Hand in hand, bodies flow
intensity, focuses aware
as mindless rhythm pervades
in this unique solitaire
Madnesses, cadence drives
in hardcore exhilaration
as each and every one
does the manic crystalization
As each comet flames out
in manic depressed
they hit cosmic bottom
and begin to coalesce
A contest entry
- Intensity Bordering on Mania by PurpleAnarch.
692 points, ended June 21, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Bi-Polar Rages by piccola.
700 points, ended August 17, 2008, 6 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Laugh out Loud by Florida Sunshine.
525 points, ended September 12, 2008, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Show us how odd you are! by Noir mariposa...x.
1750 points, ended March 17, 30 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Criticize freely, I need input to improve
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Awww I wouldn't call you odd for that =]
A very enjoyable write, it flowed well, and was an interesting read =]
Thank you for entering,
I wish you the best of luck,
Claire x
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Very enjoyable read from start to finish ~ I love the whole flow of the piece.
Thanks so much for putting the smile on my face, it was my pleasure to read and review your work
Best of luck to you,
Florida Sunshine
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Great write here! I have some family members that are manic... so I can really relate to the rollercoaster of a poem you've puzzled together
Loving the title as well!!
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Thanks for entering ^_^ the title kills me XD
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Wow! I'm not really sure how to criticise to be honest.. infact I don't think I can. I loved this. There is always room for improvement but I can't point it out since in my eyes this was perfect, every word just seemed so well placed, so carefully thought out and the flow was just amazing. Good luck in the contest!! And once again well done!
JESS xxx
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Thank you!
for such an awesome critique. Manic energy and I are old friends. This was a great chance to express that frenzied form of thought. Thank you for checking my work!
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