for I had stolen the sun
even if only a short while;
meandered in the heated days,
basked in the richest rays
never was there a brighter one.
and I sucked the earth dry
numbing lust spurned all trial;
lips embraced the chill
heart held fate at will
but spit it to the sky.
I imposed the ground
even if with subtle fist;
though many nights have cried,
the roses have died
battered ears adhere the sound.
Author notes
prompt: title/ Roses are Dead
To me, Roses represent passion and love, and love is dead. All that remains is lust and although we've had the chance to aquire love, we've destroyed all the things love needs to live. yeahhh lol
A contest entry
- Teen Idol 9: Best of the Best - Round 3 by Tangled Angle.
475 points, ended June 20, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
this is for me
Comments
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8.8
"and I sucked the earth dry
numbing lust spurned all trial;"
loved it.
this was somewhat cliche, but you did have some lovely imagery, and i do think you executed the general idea fairly well. nothing felt loose or forced. cohesive.
basically, everything worked for me, except for one thing:
just try to come up with more original imagery.
-
My words are worthless
*bows*
lol
But really i really do like this poem, the message.
The way you write.
See i write poetry.
Your a poet.
-
This reminds me of a sinster lullaby...and how the ideals of love and passion...are gone
nice job and good luck in the contest
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