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Standing on a Rocky knoll

Standing upon the rocky knoll she

looks out over the water and wonders

what it is she is in this world for.

 

He told her last night after he is married

she will have no more hopes and she cried

to sleep in the throes of depression.

 

She had looked forward to having his child

and now this was not going to happen and

she cries for that child lost.

 

She wonders what is wrong with her that no

one but a man that is to be married wants her

and she only wants him as hers.

 

Alone now she cries her heart out totally unheard

standing upon that rocky knoll she wonders if

she should say goodbye and save the hurt.

 

Words upon a computer screen or over the phone

this is all that exists of the life she craved, never

to have, does she say goodbye?

 

Looking down upon those rocks below her feet

she cries the tears of the damned, saying her

last good byes to the man. 

Author notes

She won't really say good bye to him for she isn't strong enough to turn that which she loves completely away but she does feel really really bad. I wrote this for her

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • darkstinger
    June 23, 2008
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    A tragic and sad poem. Such a good write. I am glad someone was able to write for her.

    Ray


  • ModernXTimes
    June 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I agree with dolls about the background (it is a rather distracting background, simply because, well, it's not very good), but I also agree about the poem. I really liked it. It was sad and tragic, but it also possessed a beauty that made it seem less threatening. It was a beaut! Great job!

    Sincerely,
    ModernxTimes


  • stylization
    June 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like the thoughts and the way they were portrayed. However, I feel that the background is distracting, especially with the white box. I would suggest taking the background and turning it into a border or something.


  • Quaz
    June 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Shame...

    I feel an utter feeling of tragedy within the confines of your white box. It seems to resonate well with your intent for writing this. The image here is profound, a woman in sincere pain over losing love, and the tears that follow.

    Very good, very.. depressing. >.<


  • Justin
    June 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like the thought process that goes with this poem. It feels very natural and real. The format also worked well, and it highlighted the process. well done!

1 - 5 of 5