a hopeless romanticism slipping away from my tongue,
wearing sickness's crown and daunting the summer breeze.
singing not for a metaphor,
but for my digestive system.
waking up to hear my screaming in my own ears.
from the fear of never feeling your lips fill my own.
hiding from the world so I don't have to explain,
complications of my emotional train.
trailing my eyeliner just a little bit deeper,
maybe they won't see the pain.
searching faces of strangers
wanting to see yours but always getting hurt more.
it's like a jab to my insides
trying to find my heart, but it's miles away.
i only stop breathing to hear some silence,
folding up inside just to create some elusive presence.
thinking i should lay against the cold, wood floor just a little longer,
to bring me back to somebody else's reality.
crying, not to smell the tears on my breath in the morning,
or to feel the intensity soaking in my lungs,
but to distort the sympathy in my screaming.
i'll lie here fading away on the grass you've walked on,
watching the invisible ants eating away at my emotions.
hoping to sleep away the sweat gathering on my forehead,
wishing that tomorrow won't be the same,
but missing you is a sickness i can't shake.
Author notes
Here's the different parts I got inspired by:
"So I've shamelessly gone
And made myself come undone
Heavy hangs my head when I'm unhearted."
"I wear this angel's crown
To cover up my devil's frown"
"Bellow it out with all the breath in my lungs
Apologize for all that I've done"
"Photograph each day so we can live forever
Sit in the light to make the dark a little darker
And I dance to move only you
And I fight to kiss and make up"
-Unhearted by: Automatic Loveletter.
&my name is: SatieScully
A contest entry
- ...summer is in the air... by Miss Faith.
1600 points, ended July 5, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make your music speak to me by Bean Sidhe.
600 points, ended June 21, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Is Dirty Pretty a Lost Cause? by Hell In Harmony.
6500 points, ended July 22, 2008, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me any kind of love you want by ApocalypseAngel.
450 points, ended June 27, 2008, 50 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Raw Emotion by x meerz.
500 points, ended July 28, 2008, 79 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
pretty, pretty♥
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
And... I don't think I have words for this. It's just a really kick ass piece is all that I can say. Love the emotion in it... just gawh... seems so raw at times. Amazing job here.
-
wishing that tomorrow won't be the same,
but missing you is a sickness i can't shake.
so true, so painful.
you're an awesome writer.
keep going. -
'i'll lie here fading away on the grass you've walked on,
watching the invisible ants eating away at my emotions.
hoping to sleep away the sweat gathering on my forehead,
wishing that tomorrow won't be the same,
but missing you is a sickness i can't shake.'
that ending just blew me away, this was amazing;;
loveloveloves it
♥
-
"singing not for a metaphor,
but for my digestive system.
waking up to hear my screaming in my own ears.
from the fear of never feeling your lips fill my own."
&&
"crying, not to smell the tears on my breath in the morning,
or to feel the intensity soaking in my lungs,
but to distort the sympathy in my screaming."
--Those were my favorite stanzas.
This is a fabulous write doll.
I really do like it;
bookmarking fo sho.
♥
~Princess of Shadows~ -
singing not for a metaphor,
but for my digestive system.
waking up to hear my screaming in my own ears.
from the fear of never feeling your lips fill my own.
hiding from the world so I don't have to explain,
complications of my emotional train.
trailing my eyeliner just a little bit deeper,
maybe they won't see the pain.
THAT part right there was amazing. I didn't even mind the rhyming so much. The next stanza kind of threw me off though.
i'll lie here fading away on the grass you've walked on,
watching the invisible ants eating away at my emotions.
hoping to sleep away the sweat gathering on my forehead,
wishing that tomorrow won't be the same,
but missing you is a sickness i can't shake.
Dam good ending too. Not too shabby at all
Thank you-
Kat
-
Me=love it! The last line was my fav.
-
This is really quite good. You provide quite a bit of metaphor to create the pictures in my head as I read. Nice job. Thank you for entering and good luck
-
"i only stop breathing to hear some silence,
folding up inside just to create some elusive presence.
thinking i should lay against the cold, wood floor just a little longer,
to bring me back to somebody else's reality."
oh wow! this made my heart stop for sure! thank you for entering this. I love it.
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
