You hanged yourself today over an ocean
with ligature of all the holy rosaries
that were always useless to us.
I laugh at it all, silently,
so they cannot hear me
and my kookaburra guff.
They never understood.
No,
we never understood.
Author notes
Rambling number 2...
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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A sobering glimpse into a loss, you have used fresh imagery and verbage and the way it is written gives it a raw edge that is quite effective in garnering the readers attention. Well done my friend, Write On!
Dennis
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Oh wow! I love this, I wasn't sure about the title mostly because I left it was probably a private conversation that had already been had that I wasn't in on
but I had a look anyway and I was not disappointed.
They never understood.
No,
we never understood.
I love these lines! They really hit hard. This is short, random and fantastic! Well written, that opening line really draws a reader in and once again it does not disappoint
well done.
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I love the images in here, admire the word choice.. though I'm slightly confused about where you've gone with it, it's still intense. Love it all, but I'm stranded...
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Everytime I read it, I think of another equally ridiculous possibility. I can't honestly remember what it was about... I think it was about my friend and I, how we were both so alike. She was threatening suicide once, and we had a huge argument. It was, effectively, the end of us ever being close, as we both said stupid things.
I THINK that's what it was...
but I'm confused too! -
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..well, a good read none the less. try a broad metaphorical ending perhaps
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Arguments.. I tend to block them out lately to be honest. Thats all I can say.. sorry to hear so, loosing friends takes years to get over, I know..
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We're still friends... maybe more than friends... perhaps less than friends... starting a new category of relationship that's similar to friend but a lot more complicated
Don't you love life's complexities? -
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Well its good your still....together? lol..
life- I put it down to coincidence. The simplest thing..why not?
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I always loved the word 'ligature' nasty as it actually is. Nice that you used it!
'that were always useless to us.'
simple phrasing, but my favorite of this piece for some odd reason.
'kookaburra guff.'
NEAT! *now goes to look this up...*
This has some interesting underlying emotions, though I have to say, I didn't get this piece in its entirety. Not that that is a bad thing. It leaves the reader with things to contemplate. Nicely don.
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I'm not even sure that I fully comprehend it, either! And I Wrote it
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I like this except that I feel it needs one more line...about WHAT, I have no idea.
I do think the last two lines are true of most of us. It is difficult to find another person who truly "gets" you. I always enjoy that your poetry makes me think. This did. ~ Joyce
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Good! That's what I intended That cliff-hanger. When I know how it ends, I'll come back to it, and make sure I tell you.
For now, it's an open story.
I'm glad it gets the brain cells ticking! Wish more things could do that for me
-Michelle
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Chelli,
What a read darling! This is beyond words! Something in this, really hit me hard tonight... Not sure why..
and love
Mom
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