She smiles so sweetly
With venom in her eyes
A painfully perfect
Queen of polite society
Such a lovely girl
Oppressing all the rest
With her subtle tyranny
Disguised as graceful kindness
I wish we were boys
So I could just bash her and be done with it!
Author notes
5. Backstabbing etiquette.
A contest entry
- PIF PROMPT CONTEST by penman.
700 points, ended June 20, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
hmm... inetesting. Well, I know why this poem won a trophy! It is actually very good! I can see where this narrator is coming from. Very great imagery and emotion!! hehe Awesome poem all together! Keep on writing!!
Alex -
Wonderful
Very well done. Best of luck in the contest.
-
oooh i love it. backstabbing etiquette. the whole poem is so eloquently written; i love the contradictions within each stanza; the sweetness and venom, lovely kindness and tyranny.
then you end with something so powerful like bashing her...ahaha
great write!! -
The ending made me literally laugh out loud!! Us males just don't have the etiquette your gender has, and at times I'm so glad. nice write.
-
Haha I liked the ending of this poem. I'm on that train of thought with you some times. Grrrr! You know, you CAN get an operation... just get her to get one too... lol that'll be tough.
-
Brilliant title for this option.
Oh you set up the atmosphere in your introduction the claws are out.Yeah sure like to feel like it at times but must admit am not breaking my nails for anyone. Excellent take on the prompt. good luck in the contest.
-
lol, that's ace! i love it!!
-
-
Thanks I'm glad you liked it.
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
