So here I am:
Your own perfectly twisted baby doll;
A built-in smile, eager eyes
Immune to all your petty lies
Expecting nothing but abuse,
Just ready to be used
You beckon me and I obey
Who ever thought I’d be this way?
So easily now, I back down,
Before you throw me on the ground
When I hear your voice, I start to shake
I’m not sure how much more I’ll take
And what I cannot seem to recognize
Is that I’m drowning in your endless pride
But I know that you still care.
You call me and I pick up
Even though I’ve had enough
And just like that, I’m on my knees,
Holding my breath to hide my screams
One simple touch of your strong hands
Cause me to lose my way again
And what you’ve chosen not to see
Is that you’re broken inside, like me,
And baby, you know I care.
So here I am:
Your own perfectly distorted baby doll
With a built-in smile, eager eyes,
Immunity to petty lies,
Expecting nothing but abuse,
Just ready to be used
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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So sad...I like the line 'your own perfectly twisted baby doll' The imagery is great. Just curious do you write a lot of poems about abuse? I've only seen two so far...REALLY, REALLY GOOD THOUGH!!
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oh wow... this is so sad... whats even sadder is the fact that so many people do go through this in their relationships.
"You call me and I pick up
Even though I’ve had enough"
these were probably one of my fave lines. keep writing
please ;D
xxx he broke me
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a great write about mental abuse sometimes a smack in the mouth is quicker to get over mental torture is chipping away bit by bit till theres nothing left you have wrote about it so vividly it was like watching from inside the room were this was taking place a sad poem when you have lost your own idinity its hard to leave again a brilliant write
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Amazing!!!
This has a powerful punch! I really like this line... "One simple touch of your strong hands
Cause me to lose my way again"... well put together!!!
-Ali
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Amazing!
wow verdict sez it all this is beautiful and sad at the same time i wish i could write like this lol. Gr8 job i hope to c more from u.
xxx
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this is very good!
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Brilliant!
this is fantastic! you have made a clear picture for your readers, I felt as if i was there with you. Excellent, this has to be one of my favorite writes yet. that picture is beautiful well done.
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Ahhh
This is fucking AMAZINGGG Brialicious ! Definitely in the top 10 at leasttt. Your words are so captivating and powerful and, well, you definitely have a way with them :] I loved the repetition of "Just ready to be used." Hah. So perfectly worded, my dear. Too perfectly worded.
"You call me and I pick up
Even though I’ve had enough"
Yeeeup. I can pretty much relate to those lines a little more than a lot. I guess it's always the same with every guy :-/ It makes you wonder if anyone's worth it anymore, or anyone ever has been.
"One simple touch of your strong hands
Cause me to lose my way again
And what you’ve chosen not to see
Is that you’re broken inside, like me"
Very descriptive and vivid;; loved the imagery going on in the first line. It's weird how one person can have so much control over you. I also loved the last line. Inmazing, my lovvve :]]]]
I also fell in like with the first and last stanza. They're both full of truth and are definitely very deep. I think the last two lines were my favvve though:
"Expecting nothing but abuse,
Just ready to be used"
It's pretty sad, that that's all we can expect from anybody, but who can blame us ? Wowww, Frank, this was just wow. I'm in awe. I lovvve this one<333
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