Wealth drives the vehicle
No compassion on this ride
Not one knows the other
Anyone will do
Cast a bitter sound
They don't hear it anyway
Not even the dead are alone
Make room for your spirit
It was the only important thing
That was left behind
Author notes
Photobucket prompt picture.
A contest entry
- - What's Happening? - by Desire.
700 points, ended June 24, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Thank You!!
Thank You for Your entry: New World Ending
This piece tugged hard at Spirit and while I was reading which I did several times~ I kept seeing tanks rolling in as if coming into the city~ I keep being drawn to the last line like the word: At...
could be removed to give a heightened effect~ Just a thought for when I read the line:
It was the only important thing
At that was left behind...
I stumble on the At- but that is me and maybe for others they don't have that stumble The first two lines take the reader on a strong Journey Started me off with eyes wide open-
The word: Hiroshima continually plays in my Mind after reading Your verse again- Your message tugs hard for some reason
I am being shown an egg cracked but not scrambled...as if reference to words: sunny side up Whether metaphor or symbolism...
Hopefully that makes some sense
Powerful images You have brought forth
These words grabbed and pulled~
Wealth drives the vehicle
No compassion on this ride
Unique Voice spoken~
Thank You for sharing Your Heart also Spirit!
Best wishes to You in the contest Sweet Soul
**Judging will be done shortly...
Many blessings too
and much love & light~ Desire~*~
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Thank you Desire for the fantastic comment on my poem and the compliments also. Every word spoken is an inspiration to me in the thought that can go into message. Love the way you see so deeply into my work. Really helping me to think of the mesures of the write in it's entirety. Love your thoughts and hearing them is like an echoed answer to my call. Cool stuff!! Don
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I An interesting prompt you have to work with and you hhave penned brilliance of thought. The title and introduction sets up the atmosphere in my head..it is getting over populated here hate to think what it is like on that other side...yet in spirit we do walk on...Good luck in the contest.
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Thank you for the brilliant comment on this poem! You have grasped the concept of the poem very well. Your compliments inspire me to think on into the future of things to come. Don
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