It was beautiful.
Just beautiful.
No word can truly give justice
to the Kingdom of Heaven,
the Throne-room of Elohim.
It seems like yesterday,
but then again
time has no meaning for me...
There I was, next to Elohim.
God Almighty, Himself.
Prized creation of the Creator.
Perfect in every detail.
Flawless.
Well, perhaps I did have a flaw:
El gave me self-awareness,
I could think, feel, observe.
The legions of angels,
countless servants to the Most High,
bowed in worship, in awe.
None daring the slightest bit
to look away from His Presence.
It was then that my flaw
became my disease. My sin.
For the briefest moment,
barely a hint of a thought,
I envied El
and wanted to taste that level
of worship.
Some of the servants near me
must have sensed my desire
and they ~ for even less of moment ~
shifted their attention to me.
To say that El is a jealous God
is a bit of an understatement.
He created everything,
the heavens, the earth,
right down to the smallest molecule.
If anyone should be worshiped
it was Him.
Yet I wanted some of that glory.
And what happened next...
There really is no way to give reference
in earthly terms of time and fury,
but I can tell you it happened immediately.
The servants that had a level of sympathy for me
rose up and attempted to lift me higher than God.
Literally. They were carrying me higher and higher.
They wanted all to see me, glorious me...
Envious me.
El wanted nothing to do with such blasphemy,
and with just a look, a glance in my direction,
His army cut off my newly formed allegiance.
Michael, Gabriel, the whole lot.
El's fury was swift, His words were thunder,
and His judgement quick and without trial.
I was banished from El, from the glory...
From His Glory.
People tend to think there was some mighty,
bloodthirsty war that raged in Heaven...
No, not at all. We don't bleed, for one.
No, we were cast from His Presence.
El turned His eyes from us.
Our punishment is to never dwell again
in the House of Splendor.
El decided to create a different kind of life.
A helpless race of beings made from mud
who could only survive by depending on Him.
These mud people have flaws too:
they are easily swayed to believe anything
that gives them power, entitlement.
I take joy in messing with their lives,
making their hearts wander down paths to nowhere.
If I can no longer enter the Gates of Heaven,
I'll be damned if I let many of these mud people
get the chance to be glorified in His Presence...
Oh wait, I am damned. Right.
Damn.
Author notes
Write a piece in any form about the fall from Satan's point of view.
Hebrew lesson included:
ELOHIM: God (a plural noun, more than two, used with singular verbs)
EL: God ("mighty, strong, prominent")
Illustration credit:
http://www.comicon.com/pulse/images/lucifer_40_cvr.jpg
In a list
A contest entry
- The Fallen One/ The Dark Prince by rainyday woman.
600 points, ended July 12, 2008, 4 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Suprise me :) by thenorthernstar.
400 points, ended May 25, 12 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Faust Legend/Devil by Joshua DePesa.
750 points, ended November 29, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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Interesting take on the prompt, I enjoyed the imagery(:
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wow, utterly amazing,, a totally awesome write and much luck to you in the contest
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This is a seriously good write, easy to read for a start, I like the way you write from Satans point of view,not preachy at all, that makes a refreshing change. I LIKE THE LAST BIT, IT REMINDS US TO WATCH OUR STEP, COS HE'S always ready to trip us up if he can, thanks for another good read littlefishone
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What can I say this piece is up there in the top . I like the way you took his thoughts ans I liked the ending. I also like learning as I go along and I liked the knowledge you passed my way with your authors notes. Thank you very much for entering my contest.
Cheryl
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Wonderful take on the fall of Lucifer aka Satan
and I like the bit of humor towards the end. -
see i told you you didnt need luck congratulations you earnt that spot it was very well written and was amazing you did an excelent job i love reading this poem.
great work hope i can expect much more in the near future.
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Bravo *clap* this is so good! I love poems like this maybe its my rebellious nature but this was very cool! Reminds me of that megadeth song prince of darkness I think it is called..... that or Memnoc ( not sure how it is spelled) the devil by anne rice Thanks for the entry your a finalist
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I think you have taken the event (or demise) in an interesting direction and I applaud you for that. I also thank you for the Hebrew lesson. I enjoyed the personal angle you have put on this tale and I wish you the best of luck in the contest
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wow
well i have to admitt your great
the poem is amazing you have told this story great
good luck although you dont need it lol
you deserve it hope you place
congrates on a great poem
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Bravo!
Love that ending. "Oh, wait. I am damned. Right. Damn." Great story told here. Superb, again!
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Amazing , bravo!!!!!!!!!!
This is very deep and the truth as told in The Word Of God.
I loved how you told Satan's view from a unique twist, the irony is it's truth.
Wow! Take a bow my friend you wrote an amazing,brilliant verse.
I am blown away!!!
Your,
~Lifetime~
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