count the stars
and look at me
look through the bars
and say what you see
for you, my love
the moon shines bright
so look above
into its light
hold me tight
and dont let go
it feels so right
and now you know
to know whats here
and what you need
you must hold it dear
and let it lead
remember, all my heart
it goes to you
for the world is an art
and you are the hue
you make it all perfect
its hard to explain...
but you have this effect
that washes away pain
i need you to look
and see what you should
and not what she took
because this is just the good
i love you so much
more than i show
with a shadows touch
the feeling grows
let me steal you away
to see the shooting stars
until it becomes day
to leave the world, forever ours
you are my bliss
my angel to be
and i so love this..
but you do not see
you are my dream
my glorious light
a precious beam
in my everlasting night
keep this dear
and never let it far
to wash away fear
like your beautiful star
see the milky way
and the way the world turns
its more than i can say
until your love returns
Author notes
i wrote this poem just now...
part of an epic of exploding feelings i guess
A contest entry
- Love and Emotional by Razor-Blade Romance.
1000 points, ended June 18, 2008, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Best Prewrites [Love Poems] Enter now! by perfectsunset.
475 points, ended August 17, 2008, 52 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - We're All About The Love... by hey charlie.
700 points, ended August 22, 2008, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - unconditional love by Moonlightdragon.
600 points, ended August 29, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Show me how much you love... by Nidaeah.
1000 points, ended October 31, 2008, 40 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Romance & Men by JesusFreak92.
550 points, ended December 12, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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This is a very good piece of poetry. I liked the way it flowed. keep up the great job!!!!!!!!!
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Good write
Thanks for this lovely piece.
I just wanted to point out that in accordance with rule #1 "No using the word Love" I could not let you take anything but an honorable mention. If you want to see about reworking it, it may be worth it. Thanks, and it is still awesome!
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You are my bliss,My angel to be...but you do not see.
How tue in life that sometimes we dont see or appreciate what we can have but want something more!
return the favor?
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well said
This speaks to me "keep this dear
and never let it far
to wash away fear
like your beautiful star"
Thanks for your entry
Robert
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Aww this was so deeply touching and beautifully written. I just loved it!! These lines hit me the most
"remember, all my heart
it goes to you
for the world is an art
and you are the hue"
---that was the most beautiful stanza in a poem such as this I have ever seen and so originally crafted.
Thanks for entering & best of luck
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A very sweet dedication to your loved one. Your rhyming was simple, but it did flow well. Love is amazing and I liked how you combined nature. Thanks for entering and good luck.
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What a sweet and sensual poem.
I really feel the flow of this piece and the gentle passion burning inside you. I love the feel of such a gentle poem. Well Done !
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