In the humble land of Kings and Queens
whose kingdom is there home
with wisdom born of enchantment
they’re ruled by mountain Gnomes.
Each King and Queen, in a waking dream
were taken from far off land.
They had entered this magic kingdom
Carrying whatever, could be held in hand.
They had ruled their realm unwisely
taken for granted their power unplanned
overwhelmed their subjects with taxes
demanding too much from the land.
In the hall of this mountain king
from throne on high he gleans
through a looking glass of magic
the integrity of Kings and Queens.
Deposed from their kingdom
a Stewart Gnome is sent
to govern over their realm
until remorsefully, they repent.
Placed in common fare of clothes
plow and scythe put in their hands
taught the value of basic needs
and respect for God given land!
Wisdom, ethics and integrity
are instilled in their royal blood.
One chance is given to get it right
or they’re swept away in a flood.
The misguided pure of heart repent
and go on to rule their land.
With wisdom of the ages
guiding and tempering their hand.
The evil hearted, that falsely repent
are washed away, down black holes.
Suffering for an eternity they’ll stay
Tormented in the land of the Trolls!
Author notes
http://blackbookalpha.deviantart.com/art/Odin-Sphere-Kings-and-Queens-74208893
Option 1
# 22. Magical Kingdom
In a list
A contest entry
- Fantasy by Scarlettsea.
387 points, ended July 21, 2008, 6 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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This is very creative!! I love the idea here, sending away kings and queen who missuse thier power! If only we could send our presidents away for some repenting. Great imagery and story!! Thank you so much for entering my contest and good luck!
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congrats on the gold my friend! I don't think this is fantasy at all I think it is the great bailout misused!
At any rate, the rhyme and technical side were well done and i love the graphic. Enchanting and thank you for the entry.
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Another fine story, with a fine flow and great rhymes. This is a little "morality play" among the gnomes, with "punishment to fit the crime" and a "second chance." All in one fairy-tale poem. Very nicely done.
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a golden moment to share!
The land of elves and gnomes and gremlins and trolls are a fantasy land that I like to visit over and over again.
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There is little i can add to this. Other than to say excellent and bravo!!!
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To be honest, It didn't much make sense to me but what I could understand of it was pretty darn good. Thanks for entering. Good luck!
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their home;
This quatrain fantasy falls somewhere among Lord of the Rings, Walt Disney & Harry Potter.
Of course, behind this is Old Testament Morality and a bit of Brothers Grimm.
Nothing new under the sun but I enjoyed it! I see others have pointed out small areas for treatment.
Thank you for being part of our contest's anthology, dear poet.
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Wow. What a tale. Heaven forbid they don't honestly repent! A fate worse than death. LOL
"whose kingdom is there home" 'there' should be 'their.'
It is that age old story, repent or be forever damned. Great telling in this poem. I enjoyed this very much. ~Pamela
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ha! nice sentiment here. there was one misplaced comma which annoyed me, but nicely written beyond that.
thanks for entering. -
I liked the ending very much. There are some places that need some work like you repeated land at least three times so it becomes redundant. Thank you for the entry in the contest.
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nice write
this is a good POEM, but as stated in rules I am looking for short stories.
once again great write and thanks for entering but not what I'm looking for.
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