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Monochrome Memories

&&there we were
twoofusasone
&&we had out our camera
to keep monochrome memories
of the times when we laughed so hard
we c
        r
            i
                e
                    d


&&it's just the 2two2 of us
and we're contented to totally [completely]
be our[my][your]selves
we holdxxhands
we ha ha ha laugh
we g*i*g*g*l*e
'til we have a pain in our
      --->sides<---

and we watch the sunset
sinking d
              o
                w
                    n

between the  @  trees  @
                    |            |

then we
  s  l  o  w  l  y    stroll
to the bus stop [STOP]

and we w.a.i.t.
and shift-shuffle our feet
and wish we could turn back <-- time
or stop the clock from
tick-tock-tick-tock-tocking



but nothing can take away
our monochrome memories
from our black&white photographs
and the l|a|u|g|h|s  we had


all
      day.

Author notes

[x] True

---

Prompt 2 - Black & white photographs

In a list

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Kathraina silver member
    March 20
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    Marvelous job on this piece, the wording here is powerful

  • carole21
    August 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    cleverly written . . liked "to keep monochrome memories" and "and shift-shuffle our feet" . . congrats on the trophy


  • Sue Cardwell gold member
    August 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A very interesting and unusual poem. I'm not sure that I like the format (but then I'm old fashioned) but the content and poem are excellent.

    Congratulations on the trophy

    Sue


  • The Drifter
    August 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Monochrome Memories

    MOments in time captured to spark our memories of times past--thank you--good poem--very good flow.
    bw


  • lowercase prelude gold member
    August 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love the poem's format. Very unique and original
    and the poem itself is lovely. well penned indeed


  • just mercedes gold member
    August 12, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Very original form - and a great message therein. Well done on the trophy, too!


  • Jay Aleksandr
    August 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    It isn't hard to see why you got a bronze in this contest, the formatting of the verbs is so original
    I've never seen anything like it.
    I enjoy how the poem is so light-hearted and nostalgic, especially how the title works to the idea of a black and white photograph.
    No room for improvement here.
    many thanks for commenting me too.

    Scott.

  • Page Deleted.
    June 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    &&we had out our camera
    to keep monochrome memories
    of the times when we laughed so hard
    we c
    r
    i
    e
    d

    I love those lines.

    This piece is gorgeous.

    Thanks for entering.

    Keira
    -- Liloven

1 - 9 of 9