Sitting in the tree-house
Before you lost your mind
Sitting in the tree-house
Reading a book to unwind
Sitting in the tree-house
In a different mental state
Wrappers laying from crackers we had ate
Sitting in the tree-house
I catch you if you start to fall
Before the skin on your legs began to crawl
Sitting in the tree-house
Where we had it all
A contest entry
- Anyone? Anyone there [For anyone] by RawrSmileBabyPlz.
450 points, ended June 26, 2008, 36 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Go For the Gold (For I Don't Have My Own...) by GinryuStargazer.
875 points, ends December 15, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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~84/100
-Title: 7/10 (Confused a bit on what the "sanity" part means)
-Vocabulary Choice: 6/10
-Obeying all the rules correctly: 10/10
-Freeverse: Good flow, Rhyme: Proper/Consistent Form: 7/10 (Bit too repetitive, but the rhyiming fit)
-Originality: 9/10
-Overall Message: 8/10 (I was highly impressed by the clarifying of hte subject towards the end)
-The Poem Coordinates with All of Its Parts: 10/10
-Number of Contests Already Entered In: 10
-Background Choice: 10
-Grammar: 7/10 (No punctuation/"from the crackers we had eaten) -
Aww.
Yes, it's very cute.
Even though you didn't use many descriptive words in this, I totally had a full mental picture.
And this also took me to a happy place, even though I've never been in a treehouse...
But yeah, very nice.
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I loved this poem, I really liked how you repeated "sitting in the tree-house" alot! thanks for entering
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Cute
Wow this is a very good poem. I could picture everything as i read. Its Very cute the way you describe it, It makes me wish this poem was a little longer. Very Well written i liked the flow alot. My favorite part is when you said "Sitting in the tree-house In a different mental state Wrappers laying from crackers we had ate" That was worded so good actully everything was worded so good. Great Image. Thanks for entering my contest. I wish you the best of the best of LUCK.
..<3..
Shelly
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interesting
You an interesting and unique style. I take it you like your readers to draw upon minds to see what you leave unsaid?? good style Image and Visions -
Koodles, Good luck in the contest.
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